The short and the long

[Day 31]

Today was a weird day. Lots of ups and downs. Objectively speaking a pretty good day as far as everything goes, but somehow I'm still sort of disappointed. I don't really know how or why. Maybe I'm just tired. Here's the story.

So I think I woke up a little bit off. I didn't get the best sleep last night because I was out with friends and had some wine and did things like eat way too many cookies, all just generally stuff I try to avoid. Sometimes I'm really jealous that other people get to do these things, but it also doesn't feel quite right when I'm doing them either, so I dunno. It didn't feel like my best moment. I had a lot of fun and I know that's valuable, but I really struggle with not seeing that as some kind of failure on my part. I need to be a little less uptight about everything. It's hard though to stick to this kind of routine unless you're willing to be really harsh with yourself and that isn't something I can turn selectively on and off to allow for some laid back social time. Still figuring it out.

In any case, I got to run in the morning with one of my teammates which was a huge blessing. We went short and easy, another step on the ease back into running with my knee. The knee largely felt good, a little bit of aching somewhere in mile 3 but nothing bad and it resolved before we finished so I was okay with that. We had a great conversation during the run, just sort of got caught up since it'd been a while since we saw each other, and we had smoothies afterwards and stretched and it was super nice. I think that really brightened up my whole day. We're also making plans to ride outside next weekend if the weather is nice, so I'm excited about that too.

Today's AM Workout: Easy run, 4ish miles
Summary: 4.20 mi, 40:33, 9:39 pace
Pace splits by mile: 9:55, 9:45, 9:35, 9:21, 9:35

Hit Rate: 32/33 (96.9%)

Only other note/thought I have about the run is that the cadence issues I was having before seem to be a non-issue right now. 171 average today, I'm chill with that.

The PM workout was rough. It was planned that way so I knew what I was signing up for. Everything about it was tough though, I think just from a mental standpoint, I had a really hard time knowing that the intervals were long and I was going to be upping the speed in x number of minutes and there were no real recoveries in the long main set and it made it hard for me to just focus on what I was doing in that moment because the weight of the whole rest of the set was hanging over my head. I'm also just genuinely not good at dealing with pain. Like when things get difficult aerobically, I feel like I have some capacity to deal with that, but when my legs are collecting lactate it's so tough for me to stay on track and that's something I'm really working to try and be better at. You'd think that as a backstroker burn in the legs would be right up my alley, but outside of that one specific context I actually really struggle with this. Anyways, here are the deets:

Today's PM Workout: Trainer ride, 120 mins, endurance work + some sprints to finish

Summary:

• WU: 10 mins easy 
• Pre-set: 5 x :30/:30 spin ups 
• Main Set: 5 rounds, the goal was to get them all done at base +1 gearing but it ended up being 3 rounds at base +1 and 2 rounds at base (would rather have hit the right cadences than try to be a hero)
• 5 mins low 80s rpm 
• 5 mins high 80s rpm 
• 5 mins 95 rpm 
• (no real rests) 
• 4 mins easy 
• Sprints: 2 x (6 x :45/:45 MAX sprints at base +1 over 100 rpm, 2 mins recovery) 
• WD: 5-6 mins easy
• Totals: 29.07 mi, 2:00:39, 14.5 mph average

Hit Rate: 33/34 (97%)

Notes/thoughts:

• Henry was pretty key to this entire thing even happening. Got a lot of support, was not allowed to quit before I finished, nagged me about staying in the right position, I need this in my life for every trainer ride lol.
• My butt really hurt today. More so than is typical...not sure if it was just because I was on the trainer for longer or what, but that sort of sucks. Need a new saddle, but don't really want to invest in one and also really don't have the time to go figure that stuff out. Maybe over the summer or something...
• Didn't quite hit the entire thing at the resistance I wanted, so it'll be another set to back pocket and try again later on in the process. 

I'm really tired. Lift in the books for tomorrow morning with a short 20 minute easy run tagged onto the end. Again, hoping the knee will hold out after strength work, will see how they respond to running while tired. Enjoy what's left of the weekend! (:

Much love,

Jess

Let's keep things brief

[Day 30]

I was definitely not very productive today so let's keep today's update brief.

Some things that happened today:

• Had an interesting conversation with Henry about nutrition and race weight. Still figuring that stuff out, but we're gonna make little changes one by one and see what happens with it all.
• Got to think about why it is that I do what I do. I didn't want to say this out loud but I feel like the kind of love I have for racing and training is written into my soul, sort of like the kind of love I have for medicine and human health/functioning. A lot of people get to look at things like sports from the perspective of it being an optional thing they could partake in if they wanted to. I feel like I'd be lost without this. It's weird. It makes me feel a little bit different and a little bit separate from everyone else. But at the same time I know what my callings are, so I guess I really can't complain right?

Weekly recap time!

• 3 swims, 2 trainer rides, 2 runs, 1 lift for a total of 8 sessions and a little over 8 hours.
• I was worried about it being a crowded week because the number of sessions was high given the number of days, but since the runs were short and the overall hour count was low, it actually felt completely fine. It was a good week, I'm still a little worried about the little joint issues (back, wrists, knees) but things are looking up and I'm okay with that for now.

Things are going to ramp up by a lot the next two weeks. I'm a little bit terrified, but that's always how these things go before you really dive into them. I think I'll probably feel better once I'm in the midst of it. Tired but determined is usually how that plays out. That starts with an easy morning run with Molly tomorrow morning (slowly continuing that distance increase) and what will likely be a pretty rough two hour trainer ride in the afternoon. Wish me luck!

Much love,

Jess

The good and the bad

[Day 29]

The good was this morning's swim.

Today's AM Workout: CSP practice, IM day
Summary:

• WU: 400 free swim
• Pre-set: (all were done on flexible 3rd person rest, I gave pace time estimates instead of hard cut offs)
• 4 x 100 @ 1:50, 25 free/50 IMO kick/25 free
• 300 free pull w/ paddles
• 4 x 75 @ 1:20, 25 free/25 IMO drill/25 free
• 200 swim free
• 4 x 50 IMO @ :55
• Main Set: 
• 200 free @ 3:15
• 4 x 150 @ 2:45, 50 fly/50 back/50 breast
• (break)
• 200 free @ 3:10
• 4 x 100 IM @ 1:50
• (break)
• 200 free @ 3:05
• 4 x 75 @ 1:25-1:30, 25 fly/25 back/25 breast
• WD: 100 easy
• As written, the main set had another round of 200 free @ 3:00 and 4 x 50 IMO, but we ran out of time. I want to try this set again straight through (which was how it was written) and do it all and maybe bump up the pace times a bit.
• Total distance: 3800 SCY (4200 SCY as written)

Hit Rate: 30/31 (96.7%)

Notes/thoughts:

• It feels so good to be getting back into the groove. I would have preferred pace times to be a little quicker this morning, but I wanted to be fair to my lane and I knew I couldn't hit the fast lane pace times so I couldn't move up, so I've been committing myself to doing my absolute best with these pace times as they stand. It meant that today, I led (and felt really confident doing it, which is the first time I've felt that way about leading all year) and I attacked every single repeat because I knew I was going to get in with lots of time to rest before I attacked the next one. I can't be up there swimming the challenging pace times, so I'm going to challenge myself to execute every single repeat at my best effort regardless of the pace time.
• I will, however, probably find an opportunity to swim alone at some point and try to hit this workout again with some adjusted pace times and straight through. I really liked this set, so I'm going to put it back on the calendar probably sooner rather than later, just for kicks.

The bad was this afternoon's run.

Today's PM Workout: Easy 3ish mile run

Summary: 3.11 mi, 29:41, 9:32 pace

Pace splits by mile: 9:09, 9:44, 9:39

Hit Rate: 31/32 (96.8%)

Notes/thoughts:

• Okay it actually wasn't that bad because my knee felt fine! I mean the occasional twinge, but those were more likely isolated bad steps and I'm a little bit hyperaware of it all right now anyways because it's what I'm paying attention to.
• I did, however, have some back pain that's been creeping in the past day or two that actually made me feel really tight and uncomfortable while running today. Still have to work on that form and getting lean from the ankles instead of the hips. Also need to really have that be something I pay attention to during the day when it comes to how I sit and stand. I need to have my posture be minimally taxing on my back during my non-training time so it doesn't become an issue during training time.
• It was about the pace I wanted it to be but it felt really slow and sluggish. It wasn't hard in the physically taxing sense but it did feel hard. Like my steps just felt really heavy and I wasn't getting the same kind of reflexive bounce off the ground that I usually do (I usually feel pretty light when I run) and the cadence felt slow even though at 172 spm it's not as bad as it had been previously (I was really consciously trying to work on this because I know it helps with the knee issues). I also felt very locked into a single pace, not in the sense that my pace didn't vary as the run went on but more so in the sense that if I wanted to go faster or slower, I don't think I could have made those pace adjustments very easily. It's like I got stuck in that one gear, which is how I used to always feel about running but had made a lot of improvements on in the past year or so, so it sort of sucks to feel like I'm back where I started in that regard.
• In any case, I think all of that really adds up to feeling a little bit disappointed with the state of the running. I just feel like I'm very very very far from where I want to be and it's just not exciting to think that all I can really do in the next few weeks is do a lot of slow runs that will get me back up to running longer distances and help me build the right kind of aerobic fitness to try and tackle other things. And it really is like adding insult to injury when even a short and slow run doesn't feel good. There's work to be done. I just have to set the feelings aside for now and do the work. It pays off in the end, I know that, I can look to things like my swimming for reassurance that it does pay off in the end. I'm just impatient is all.

In other news, I'm going ice skating tonight! It's a sponsored event school is hosting and I'm really not one for turning down free ice skating in the park. Will have to stretch tonight and then tomorrow is a day off! Yay! Days off = so glorious. I'll do my weekly recap tomorrow. (:

Much love,

Jess

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cxjvTXo9WWM

[Day 28]

See that title up there? Yeah that one? New Sia. Check it out if you know what's good for your soul.

Today's Workout: AM CSP practice, sprint free day
Summary:

• WU: 250-200-150-100-50 swim @ 10SR 
• It was warm up, I showed up a few minutes late, so inevitably due to weird lane things I think I skipped a total of ~125 over the course of the warm up that I won't count in my total yardage for the day...
• Main Set:
• 8 x 75 free @ 1:15, 7 yd breakout/moderate/7 yd finish hard
• 8 x 125 free @ 2:00, 50 moderate/25 fast no breathing 3 strokes out of turn/50 moderate
• 5 x 100 kick w/ fins @ 1:30, 5 yds fast underwater off each wall/moderate (I did back)
• 4 x 75 free @ 1:15, 25 MAX/50 easy
• 400 free easy, focus on long strokes/reach/DPS
• 100 free MAX (I went 1:10 from a push)
• WD:
• 200 easy
• 4 x 75 free @ 1:15, RB 6/5/4 by 25
• Total Distance: 4025 SCY (4150 SCY as written)

Hit Rate: 29/30 (96.6%)

Notes/thoughts:

• This week has been nice because I've been feeling better just in general. I don't know if I've talked about this yet, but I go through cycles of being really overworked/exhausted and then adapting/adjusting. Right now I'm on one of those upswings where my body has sort of figured out how to recover on this kind of schedule so I'm just generally feeling good and energy levels are bouncing back and it's really nice. At some point we'll up the intensity of some of the workouts (e.g. runs will get longer as I figure out what my knee can handle, trainer rides are going to get longer and probably harder, etc.) and I'll get bounced back down to being tired a lot, but for now I'm enjoying just feeling good for the most part. (There are still times like this morning when I was really exhausted and just sort of wanted to stay in bed forever after breakfast, but I've bounced back pretty well since then and that bouncing back is really the big difference between the good weeks and the not so good weeks.)
• The fun thing about working hard once you've gotten into a bit better shape it that it feels completely different. It's just got a whole different texture to it. It feels like instead of trying really hard to not fall behind, you're working to get ahead, and those two things are so completely different even if you're doing the exact same work. I think that's one of those things that's really helped me with workouts this week. I've honestly not felt very motivated going into any workout, but once I've gotten going I feel like I've been really good at just digging in and loving the process because it feels like I'm taking steps forward. It's been good. (:
• The swim today was particularly reassuring. I feel like my swimming has been on the up and up in general. Possibly because of more consistency, possibly because of strength work, possibly because I'm still making adjustments to my stroke (or really just trying to bring it back to what it used to be) and things are coming together. I really like sprint workouts that are details focused, Thursdays are fun for me even though sometimes I wonder what the point really is when my race distances are like a mile. 
• Today was particularly awesome because we kept up with the fast lane and about halfway through the workout I realized that I have sort of an inferiority complex about that lane that was holding me back and did something to fix that. Even when we're on the same send offs, when I get dropped by the person who leaves the wall at the same time as me, I just let it go instead of fighting it. Today I got a little bit of confidence from a fluke 25 that I swam really fast because right before my push off, our coach was behind the block in my lane yelling coach things about swimming fast and my 12-year-old age grouper reflexes kicked in and I did as I was told. I hit that turn at the same time as the swimmer in the fast lane next to me (instead of 3/4 to a full body length behind him) and it just clicked that there was nothing stopping me but me. So when we did our max 100 and the swimmer in the fast lane started to pull ahead, I was complacent for about a stroke or two before I decided that I was going to race her and I was going to win. I don't think I won, we touched at almost the same time, but I was really proud of myself for going after it because that's something I wouldn't have done even a week ago. A 1:10 from a push isn't horrible, I'll take it given where I'm at right now. I would have probably liked to be under that, I don't really know by how much, but for now I'll be satisfied with that. 

Today is sort of busy but whatever, that's life, I'm getting to do everything I want to do with my life so I can't really complain. Double day tomorrow, another swim in the morning, a short 3 miler outside in the PM to continue with this knee trial thing. But seriously though. Go listen to Sia.

Much love,

Jess

Learning to pick up the pace

[Day 27B]

One of the exciting things about triathlon is that no two races are ever the same. Races may be of the same distance if they're standard distances, but otherwise the terrain and conditions are super variable from course to course and from day to day on the same course. One of the things that I struggled with when I first started learning the land disciplines is how to deal with terrain. We don't have terrain in swimming. (Well I guess in open water we sort of do, in the sense that conditions are sort of like terrain, but as someone from a swimming background I have the feel for the water and experience to get me through whatever is thrown at me conditions wise so I've never really had this issue with swimming.) In addition, coming from a really flat place (Windsor, Ontario, Canada), my experience with hills was literally zero. So when I was first trying to get the hang of running and biking hills, what I found was that I was usually pretty good at grinding my way to almost the top, but as soon as the steepest section passed and the uphill slowly started to level out, I would lose all of my drive/energy/momentum and just sort of die. The hardest part of any hill for me for some reason was never on the parts with the steepest grades, but rather the section that came just after that as the hill started to level out at the top.

In trying to tackle that, I sort of fell back on open water racing experience, which had taught me a lot about how important it is to be able to kick it up a gear on command and then come back down to whatever race pace was without needing some form of extended recovery. (Sometimes you have to pass people or sometimes you have to catch up to someone to get in a good draft spot, etc. etc.) So quality active recovery was something I trained in the pool so I could up the intensity and drop back at will without blowing myself completely. It was something I started to play around with on the bike and on the run last summer in a bunch of different contexts because I figured it would be a useful skill there too. So that was a really long winded explanation of what I was going for here with today's set. Here it is!

Today's PM Workout: Trainer ride
Summary:

• WU: 10 mins easy 
• Pre-set: 5 x :30/:30 spin ups 
• Main set: 10 x 5 on/1 off, alternating...
• 2 rounds split as 2 @ base (95 rpm), 1 pick up @ base + 10 rpm, 2 @ base, 1 recovery 
• 2 rounds split as 2 @ climb (+4 gears, 60 rpm), 1 pick up @ climb + 10 rpm, 2 @ climb, 1 recovery
• (until you get to 10 rounds)
• Technique work: 10 x :45/:15 single leg drill 
• WD: 5 mins easy 
• Totals: 21.47 mi, 1:30:17, 14.3 mph average

Hit Rate: 28/29 (96.5%)

Notes/thoughts:

• I feel like my bike set up needs adjusting again. I'm not sure what the deal is but normally I find myself wanting to push back in the saddle during the harder efforts but today I was definitely shifting forward, which is strange for me. I may or may not try and play around with that, see if higher/further forward works a little better for me pedaling mechanics wise. I will also probably go get re-fit professionally in the spring, but in the meantime I figure it can't hurt too much to try some positional changes, especially since my body is asking for it. Just have to make sure I don't do anything that results in weird mechanical joint/muscle pain. Will be careful...
• Not gonna lie, the knees are achy. Gonna take an NSAID tonight, hopefully won't linger. The knees were fine during the day and I spent a lot of time on my feet today, so that was reassuring, but I hope the biking doesn't continue to be sort of tough on them.
• I can't decide if I found the lower cadence rounds to be harder or the higher cadence ones...Maybe really what I found hard were just the one minute push intervals? Lol I don't know. It was pretty rough. I can usually tell because somewhere in the middle my brain totally goes and I can't remember what's coming next unless I look at my timer to tell me. That happened on like round 4 or something and I was like, oh, this is going to be a long one. But I got through and I'm pretty happy with how it panned out in the end. 
• Random one: APAC is starting on the other side of the world in about a half hour. I will be diligently stalking prelims via MeetMobile. Yesterday was the 5 year anniversary of my last APAC. I had posted a Facebook status about making it through to 3 finals and being on two girls relays that medalled. It made me really nostalgic, it had been a really great way to close out my high school swimming career, I miss that team so much all the time. I hope the little ones (some of whom I have known since they were literally in elementary school) have a fantastic time and do a fantastic job this week/weekend. 

Okay, it's been a long day, time to go home and double check my bike tire pressure so I can hit up the pool tomorrow morning. Happy hump day!

Much love,

Jess

Patience

[Day 27A]

Took that test run this morning. Knee felt okay. It was a little bit sore honestly but it wasn't hurting in the IT band spot, was more diffuse anterior pain, which might just be residual stuff from Monday's ride and not too run specific? It wasn't bad enough that I felt like I had to stop, so I did the 20 minutes and just left it at that. I had been thinking about maybe taking a 20-30 minute row afterwards if my knee felt good, but it was super great so I thought I would just rest it seeing as it'll be getting some more action this afternoon when I take my trainer ride anyways. We'll see how it holds up as the day goes on, I'm making a trip to the grocery store today and that walk will probably tell me a lot about how things are going. Here's the summary:

Today's AM Workout: 20 minute easy treadmill run, testing the knee
Summary:

• 2% incline, 6.2 speed throughout
• Treadmill numbers: 2.10 mi, 20:36
• Garmin numbers: 2.19 mi, 20:09, 9:12 pace

Hit Rate: 27/28 (96.4%)

I honestly feel like I shouldn't even call that a workout, it was so so chill. But I know that if I don't count these workouts as legitimate workouts, I would get tempted to do too much too fast because I like to feel like I'm training, I don't like to feel like I'm rehabbing a poorly looked after joint. So I'm going to count them and legitimize them because it'll help me be patient with the process which will be good for me in the long run. The sad part of this I think is that this week is actually going to be strangely low volume since I'm planning on running again on Friday and both of these workouts are slash will be super short compared to my typical workouts and it was already a short week to begin with. The upside though is I got up at my usual time, finished super early, and go to shower and eat and head out to school and get some work done before my morning classes, which was really nice.

I pretty much spent my 20 treadmill minutes this morning thinking about the process going forward. I was really looking forward to doing more speed focused run training this year, since I got some of that in last October before my half and it made such a huge difference to my running. With the setback though, it looks like we'll be back to just focusing on getting the right kind of volume and building back up in a pretty purely aerobic sense to try and make sure I'm not taking on too much too fast. I'd rather play this a little safer and be a little slower than go all in and get hurt again. I tell myself that it'll be okay and I'll run slow this first half of the year and spend my month in Boston (when I'm away from my bike and the gym and will probably be swimming with CMSC there) trying to get back on the speed/strength/interval work bandwagon. If I can stay healthy that long, that'll be the plan. I just have to be patient. There's no cheating the process when it comes to building up the right kind of base.

Time for class now! I'll be back with the afternoon trainer update later in the day. (:

Much love,
Jess

"The tension is here..."

[Day 26]

"The tension is here between who you are and who you could be."

Google that if you don't know where it comes from, but I figure a lot of you will know what song that's from. Shuffle gifted me with this on the walk to school this morning. It was a nice morning pump up song. Thank you shuffle. (:

Today's Workout: Gym sesh! Upper body stuff.
Summary:

• Flat bench: WU 12 @ 45#, 3 x 10 @ 75#, 15 @ 55 (bonus round! lol)
• The bonus round burned my shoulders sooooooo hard
• Pulldowns: 4 x 12 alternating wide/narrow @ 6 plates (need to go up in this next time...)
• Shoulder press: 3 drop sets with 25#/15#, rep counts of 8-8, 8-8, 5-8/5/2 (going for 15 lol)
• Effort on the last round of this wasn't where I wanted to be...Gotta stay in it more.
• Single arm DB row: 3 x 12 @ 40# 
• Opted for DBs instead of BB today because my back's not feeling super hot today.
• Wasn't getting full range of motion on a few reps on the left side, just something to think about more.
• Incline bench: 3 x 12 @ 55#
• Half of me wants to be like, this is literally no weight I don't know why this has been giving me so much trouble, but it had. I think this is the first time I've hit all 3 sets this year.
• Cable pulldowns: 3 x 15 @ 5 plates (up the weight next week)
• Superset: 3 x
• Bicep curls: 12 @ 15#/side
• Skull crushers: 12 @ 10#/side
• What is accessory/isolation work. Minimal rest between sets. Weight needs to be going up next time (lol if that ever happens again).
• Superset: 3 x 
• 12 lateral raises @ 10#/side
• 12 front raises w/ 25# plate

Hit Rate: 26/27 (96.2%)

I woke up with like a negative amount of motivation this morning, but I did get myself to the gym and do some number of the things, so I'll take it. Need to go heavier in a lot of things, need to not just quit on the terrible volume sets, pretty typical day outside of that. 

Body updates: My knee hurt when I woke up this morning so I axed the rowing I had planned for after the lift, hoping that just babying it today will help it feel better so I can try and run on it tomorrow. It's sort of discouraging that that's going on though. This is my problem with high effort trainer rides: Sometimes your form falls apart and it definitely shows in your body the next day (my knee, my back). My wrists were giving me the business yesterday and in the past week in general. They've just felt real loose and achy, so I was worried about how the lifting would treat them, but for the most part they felt fine during the workout and have continued to feel fine as the day goes on, so hopefully that's not an issue. If the joint issue thing continues to be a problem in the next few weeks I might seriously consider finding a joint supplement somewhere. I have terrible joints. They need all the help they can get.

That's all for today! Test run in the morning tomorrow (top out at 20 minutes easy on the treadmill) and a trainer ride in the PM on the books for tomorrow. Have a lovely Tuesday!

Much love,

Jess

No room for noise

[Day 25B]

That was the hardest short trainer session I've done in a while...Wow. Just goes to show that I'm bad at pinning down what workouts will feel tough and what workouts will feel easy. Here's the rundown:

Today's PM Workout: PM trainer ride, 60 minutes
Summary:

• WU: 10 mins easy 
• Pre-set: 5 x :30/:30 spin ups 
• Main Set: 8 x (3 mins on, 2 mins recovery) at 95 rpm, starting at base (big ring in front, 2nd biggest ring in back to start), going up one gear each minute attempting to hold cadence throughout 
• Cadence thing did not happen, it looked more like 95/90-95/86-92 as average ranges
• WD: 5 mins easy 
• Totals: 14.69 mi, 1:00:38, 14.5 mph average

Hit Rate: 25/26 (96.1%)

Honestly, it's just been a really long day and it's going to be a really busy week and I'm mildly stressed about everything there is for me to do. Today it's been pretty non-stop, I had practice, I had class from 8:30-5:00, I dealt with some secretorial-esque errands for about an hour after class and had to field a phone call from my mom so I wasn't even home until 6:15 pm and couldn't be on my trainer til 6:30 knowing that I had to eat dinner and take care of some emails before hitting the sack early so I can hit the gym early tomorrow. This was the kind of day where I would have been happy to just let workout number two slide and bump down that hit rate a bit because it was genuinely a little crazy. But I had so much good momentum from this morning and Henry had given me the best pep talk last night and I know that some days are going to be hard but they make you better in every sense of the word so I felt like I had to do it so I did. 

It was tough. I was not expecting it to be this tough but it really really was. Gonna keep this particular workout in my back pocket and try to hit it again in a few weeks and hopefully do better at holding the goal cadences. I definitely like almost called it quits about 3 times but I was listening to Swimcerely and gosh these women are just so extraordinarily inspirational. Let me explain.

I think one of the things that I struggle with a lot is the idea that someone out there is looking at what I'm trying to do with my life and going, "That's unsustainable. She's trying to do too much and she's just going to burn out and she can't be successful at all of these things that she wants to be successful at". And as much as I'm more than willing to take that challenge head on and prove people wrong, I also have to wonder if maybe there's some or even a lot of truth to those statements. (The best thing about this situation is how hypothetical "these people" are.) Anyways, my point is that Swimcerely really reminds me that there are people out there doing crazy hard things that commit to it and chase after it with everything they have just because they love it and it's what they want and it doesn't matter how plausible it is or isn't to other people. All of that is just noise, and in my case, a lot of the noise I hear is coming from nowhere but my own head. I just have to ignore that noise and do me. Follow your bliss right? And hey, it's not like I don't have a wonderful support network to get me where I want to go. I just have to be a little better at believing. 

Okay I've been really sappy today. Sorry I'm not usually this sappy, but it's honestly just how I feel. I think a little bit of this sappiness underlies everything about me, it's just hidden under a lot of other stuff usually. In any case, already past my bedtime so I'm gonna shower now and try and get lots of sleep. Happy Monday! (:

Much love,

Jess

Finding the fire

[Day 25A]

I did not expect distance free day to be my breakthrough day. But it totally was. What is this madness. I've felt really restrained about my swimming recently. I want to say it was limited to the past month, but in reality I think it stretches all the way back to like September-ish of last year. I mean sure, I'm slower, which factors into it, but I think more than that what's been frustrating for me is that my heart hasn't really been in it. I've been doing this long enough that I know I'm at my best when I get in the pool and feel like swimming fast and pushing hard makes me come alive. But recently I've just done a lot of bare bones get through the distance kind of swimming and it's just felt like going through the motions inside of really diving deep and getting into it.

For some reason today was different. It was weird because I woke up pretty minimally motivated to go to practice. Distance days in short course sort of suck, that's just how it goes, and it was early and I was tired and the list of complaints I had really just goes on and on and on and on. I was pretty mellow during warm up and the pre-set, but pretty much as soon as we hit the push off for the first 500 of the main set, it was like a switch flipped and I just sort of attacked it.

I feel like a couple things went into that. The other lane was going on a set of initial intervals that I knew I would've been able to make a year ago (7:30 for the 500, 1:25 for the 100s) and I figured their intervals would get faster as the set went on (I was right, although I don't know the details) and those 100s would have been rough for me if I went for it on that pace, but I guess I was just sort of upset that I knew that I wasn't there right now. I knew I wouldn't have been able to hit those numbers if I was in that other lane and it pissed me off a little bit. I also started like 10 seconds back from when I was supposed to go because we were figuring out lane order, so I had to chase our lead swimmer down, which probably also helped. But the net result was that I went a faster pace than I expected myself to swim (I mean all told it was still pretty slow, I would've wanted/expected to be under 7:00 for the 500s and not once was I under 7:00 today) and it made me feel like I had found myself again. And I was so excited to just do what I do best and I was a little bit cranky about the slightly slow pace times but I tried to see it as an opportunity to just swim faster and beat the pace times by a lot. (Pace time pressure normally helps me, I normally need hard to make pace times to motivate me. Today though, I really really tried to see the pace times as just an indicator of when I had to leave for the next one and not a measure of how fast I was supposed to be going so I tried to clear them by more than the usual 5 or 10 seconds.)

Anyways, in the end I just had a great time pushing the pace, which is how I've always felt about swimming but had sort of lost recently. It was just such a relief to love the feeling of moving through the water a little bit faster than my body really wanted to instead of feeling like it was something I was supposed to be doing that I didn't want to be doing because it hurt. I had such a great time. I feel like today I found the part of me that fell in love with this sport as a kid and never looked back. It all just makes me so happy. I don't know how you can beat that sort of thing in terms of a way to start the day. In any case, here it is:

Today's AM Workout: CSP practice, distance free day
Summary:

• WU: 500 swim
• Pre-set: 2 x
• 100 kick
• 4 x 50 free @ :50
• 100 IM
• 4 x 25 free @ :25
• Main Set:
• 500 free @ 8:00 (~7:10)
• 5 x 100 free @ 1:35
• 500 free @ 7:30 (~7:10-7:15)
• 10 x 50 free
• 1-3 @ :55
• 4-5 @ :45
• 6-8 @ :55
• 9-10 @ :45
• 500 free AFAP (~7:02)
• WD: 100 easy
• Total distance: 4100 SCY

Hit Rate: 24/25 (96%)

The real question now is, is the magic going to stay? And the answer is probably not. There are always better days and worse days. But I think this is the kind of day that's good to look back on when there are worse days because you always have to get through a number of those to get to a great one like today. I'm excited. I want to feel like this every time I hit the water ever again for the rest of my life. I can't expect or guarantee that, but I'm gonna stick with it and hopefully the universe will bless me with some more in the upcoming days/weeks/months.

Trainer ride in the books for after class today, short 60 minute spin with what will hopefully be some good high intensity work. It's gonna be a late day, thus the short ride, but I'm doing my best to get what needs to be done done within the constraints of my schedule. Okay time to go to more class!

Much love,
Jess

Sharing the love

[Day 24]

Rest days are wonderful, but I just watched the Patriots lose in pretty heart-breaking fashion to the Broncos in the AFC Championships so...right now I just want to go pick a fight with someone. I think right after the loss I wanted to cry and eat buckets of Nitya's amazing homemade fudge for hours on end, but a little bit of time has passed and I'm now in "I want to fxck shit up" mode. In any case, let us not dwell on that but instead focus on something more positive that happened to me today on my lovely day off!

So the med school hosts a winter formal of sorts every year called the Red Dress Affair, in which you get to wear red and help support the American Heart Association. I wasn't able to attend this year because it was last weekend and I was out of town at Killington with Henry. I did, however, contribute by donating 2 hours worth of swim lessons to the auction. Today, I met my student for the first time (one of his friends won the lesson and gave it to him) and I got to spend about 45 minutes in the pool introducing the wonderful world of swimming to a non-swimmer. It was fantastic!

For context, I taught a lot of lessons during my college years. It was a really rewarding job that paid well and I always got roped into teaching more lessons than I realistically had time for. Teaching was always such an amazing way to share something I love with other people, and I've always been a little bit sad that I don't have time for it now with med school and everything. It was nice just to have a one off opportunity to do that again. The best part is when you start to see the subtle bits of swimming physics (which is so different from substantive-gravity-involving land physics) start to click with the person you're teaching and it's like "Yes! Welcome to my side of the universe!". It was fun, I had fun, I think I needed some of that this week and it was nice to get it in the context of doing something that I really genuinely love.

As for body updates: my legs are sore but completely functional, so the way I like to put it is if I had to live the rest of my life this way it would be totally fine (which is exactly the level of sore I like to be if I have to experience soreness in one way or another). I just stretched and rolled out and am hopeful about the IT band continuing to not give me any problems. I've got a busy busy week (I'm helping organize a couple of talks this week relating to primary care because that's one of my big interests and I'm trying to squash 8 workouts into 5 days and I'm behind on work and life and everything and I have two of my selective meetings this week which means days like tomorrow where I'm in class from 8:30 am to 5 pm so things are a little crazy), but we'll get through. I believe. (:

Hope everyone had a great weekend!

Much love,
Jess

Random update time!

Did core stuff, will write down.

Core!

• Planks: 2/1/1/1:30 w/ 30 SR b/w (front/side/side/front for anyone new to this)
• 50 wrist-to-knee sit ups
• 50 leg lifts + 10 x 10 second negatives
• 100 Russian twists
• 2 x 25 V sit ups
• 100 Russian twists
• Planks: 1:30/:45/1:00/1:30 (dropped out of the right side down one...that shoulder is sad today for some reason)

Props to evil task master Henry for making me do all that. Also I stretched! Yay bedtime. (But booooo physio take-home with which I'm still not finished sadface.)

Much love,

Jess

Mixing it up with friends! (And the weekly recap!)

[Day 23]

I didn't go swimming in the morning. I woke up around 5 am and realized I didn't get nearly enough work done yesterday to be able to spend my extra time in the pool, so I used the time to get some work done instead (and was actually fairly productive, so it was time well spent). Just stuck to the original plan of hitting the gym w/ Fay and doing a leg day. I tried things out her way today, which was a lot more volume than I'm used to (even though she typically goes even more volume heavy than this - I now totally understand why Henry gets disgruntled about volume when he's working out with me). I had a ton of fun though, even though that first giant set was killer tough. It was nice just to like go to the gym and mix it up and do something new for a change. Everyone can use a change of pace every once in a while. (Isolation work? What even is isolation work?) We also met a dude at the gym who talked to me about music briefly and let me put on a playlist based around the latest Bring Me The Horizon album off of some cool app he had on his phone and I got to rock out while working out which was pretty awesome. (Also meeting new people was pretty cool. All in all, was a pretty cool morning.)

Today's Workout: AM Gym Sesh w/ Fay! (Yay workout buddies!)
Summary:

• Giant set: 3 x 
• 15 back squats @ 75#
• 15/side split squats @ 30# (DB)
• 15/side reverse lunges @ 30# (DB)
• Leg extensions: 3 x 12/12 drop sets of 90/50#
• Seated hamstring curls: 3 x 15 @ 70#
• Leg press: 3 x 15 @ 130/150/150#
• Not super strict about rests/pauses/etc.

Hit Rate: 23/24 (95.8%)

I have no important notes or thoughts lol. I think I was having too much fun maybe. xD I just kept wanting to like jump up and grab pull up bars and just hang off of things and do handstands. It was silly. It wasn't like my legs weren't hurting or I wasn't actually working or whatever, I just had a lot of energy and was having a really good time. (Maybe it was because it was a 9 am workout so I got to eat breakfast a couple hours before and energy stores were looking good? Hmmmmm...I wonder. But also maybe because friends make everything happier? Hmmmmmmmm...more wondering.) Things feel good now, legs are a bit tired but definitely doing okay. Will try to maybe do some core work tonight and will definitely be stretching. 

The week in review!

• 1 run, 2 lifts, 2 dryland sessions (circuit + rowing, just rowing), 2 trainer rides, and 1 swim for a total of ~9:15 (8 sessions total)
• It's been a weird week. I guess that's what happens when you get injured. I sort of thought I would end up upping the swims and bikes more to compensate for running less but I guess I just went the "go to the gym more" route. Which is fun, and this wasn't yet a serious week, so I have no qualms about it being just fun.
• Next week gets more serious though, that's sort of what I consider my first week into a real block of training. The block will be focused on quality riding and swimming but the first week will really just be an ease into it kind of week. I'm going to take tomorrow (Sunday) off and the Saturday at the end of the week off to get back on my Saturdays off schedule, so it'll only be a five day training week (yaaaaas) but I'm still going to try and get 8 workouts in so we'll see how that goes. The breakdown as of right now is 3 swims (praying for not super freezing weather so I can bike out to practices), 2 trainer rides, 1 gym sesh, and hopefully 2 short runs to get back to running (first one on Wednesday, fingers crossed that the IT band holds out!). I think the overall breakdown of number of workouts will be comparable in the next few weeks as they had been in the past two weeks, I'll just shift my focus a little bit to cater more to the "important" days (and of course many of those workouts will be seeing increases in length...yay...).

In completely unrelated news, I bought myself two massive tubs of ice cream after the health screening today, so I should have enough ice cream to last me the remainder of my lifetime. Awwwwwww yeah.

More med school learnings time now!

Much love,

Jess

Living room workouts are turning out to be pretty clutch

[Day 22B]

I just ate a lot of BBQ. Very happy about that.

Today's PM Workout: Trainer ride, endurance work
Summary:

• WU: 10 mins easy 
• Pre-set: 5 x :30/:30 spin ups 
• Main set: 4 x 
• 4 mins @ 90-95 rpm base 
• 4 mins @ 60 rpm climb (base +4)
• 4 mins @ 90-95 rpm base 
• 3 mins @ 90-95 rpm pick up (base +1) 
• 3 mins easy 
• Technique work: 10 x :45/:15 single leg drill 
• WD: ~5 mins easy 
• Totals: 22.66 mi, 1:33:12, 14.6 mph average

Hit Rate: 22/23 (95.6%)

Notes/thoughts:

• The point of this workout was to learn to recover from the pick ups without dropping the base effort. Just building nice long steady endurance. 60 mins without a full recovery, it was good. (Last round was tough but all in all I'm willing to step it up the next time I do an iteration of this. Haven't decided if I wanna change pace/resistance/total time yet, so we'll see.)
• The best thing about workouts like this one is that they calm the rest of my life freak outs. I was sort of losing it over how much work I have to do and how behind I feel but I conquered this thing so it makes me feel like I can handle whatever else there is that life wants to throw at me. Reminders that we're deeper than we think. 
• My brain definitely went offline in the latter parts of that workout. If I didn't have my timer (get the Seconds app if you haven't already!) running with what each interval was supposed to be written down on it, I would have totally lost my place. All I could really focus on was keeping the pedals turning at the right speed. 
• Worth noting that I had some pretty bad wrist pain in the first 30 or so minutes of the ride (right side). I just adjusted my position a bunch of times and eventually found something that eased it up, and then later on it just seemed to go away...Dunno what the deal is. Will keep an eye on it though.
• Was listening to Swimcerely again (love it sooooo soooooo much) and was thinking about team dynamics in swimming and how we're all super competitive people but at the end of the day we're all rooting for each other and working to lift each other up. It's funny because I'm in medical school now and I feel like applicants are always asking things like whether or not it's competitive and never in my life had I associated competitiveness with sabotage or other negatively connoted actions before so it's been weird to try and address those things. Honestly I feel like medical school much closer resembles a swim team. We're all trying to do something that is, at the end of the day, honestly really difficult. We all work really hard, we're all doing our best, and we all want to be successful. But just because we want to be successful doesn't mean that we don't want our peers to be successful too. We do a lot to help lift each other up, because it's wonderful to help others and it's wonderful to be helped by others. I sort of dislike that people pit competitiveness and genuine niceness against each other because that's not how I think it works. I'm extremely competitive. But I also have a lot of love for my teammates and classmates and I want them to succeed just as much as I want to succeed. And beyond that, I want to play a part in supporting them and helping them succeed whenever it's possible, and I'm 100% sure that they feel the same way about me. I think we really need to lose this notion that competitive people are just out to get you and want you to fail so they can look good. I honestly don't think that's how it works, at least not in my experience. Okay end random Jess musings. Check out Spin's podcast though, it's fantastic. 

So random last minute decision: I'm going to swim practice tomorrow morning! Because...why not? It's 6-7 am, I'll have time to come home and eat some food and get a tiny bit of rest before I go lift with a classmate at 9 am. That'll be okay right? Right? Lol I'm an addict. Someone help me. Anyways, after that it's a pretty busy day. I've got a health screening to work in the afternoon and a take home exam I haven't looked at yet that I really need to start on. But I believe! Gonna go home (I'm in lab right now, but it turns out I couldn't do any lab work because I'm still short a few accesses, which is annoying because I've requested like 7 accesses already and apparently I need even more) and stretch and do some more studying and then hit the sack. 5:25ish alarm tomorrow morning so 9ish bedtime? (Wow so much sleeping in.) That'll be the goal. 9:30 wouldn't be the end of the world either. Alright, that's all from me! (:

Much love,

Jess

Kate is fast

[Day 22A]

The main news in my life right now is that my appetite is becoming unbearable obnoxious. I don't think I ever stopped being hungry between the hours of 3 pm and 9 pm yesterday...I pretty much ate until I felt like I was going to make myself sick if I kept eating, and was still hungry...What are these problems. Why. Anyways, I swam. (And got a ride in a warm warm car it was so wonderful not to have to bike in the very very cold thank the universe for lovely teammates.)

Today's AM Workout: CSP practice, IM day
Summary:

• Everything was swum on whatever pace Kate led the set at...
• WU: 300 swim (500 as written but we showed up late)
• Main Set:
• 4 x 50 kick IMO 
• 400 pull w/ paddles
• 4 x 50 drill IMO
• 300 kick w/ fins
• 4 x 50 swim IMO
• 3 x 200 pull w/ paddles descend 1-3
• 6 x 150 
• 1, 4 - 25 fly/back/breast, repeat
• 2, 5 - free
• 3, 6 - 50 fly/back/breast
• WD: 100 easy
• Total Distance: 3200 SCY

Hit Rate: 21/22 (95.4%)

Kate led my lane today! Even though she really should have been in the fast lane, doing fast lane things. On one hand, it was awesome, because she's great at lane leading and we didn't spend forever on the wall trying to figure out what we were doing and what pace time we were going on. On the other hand, Kate is fast. I don't even think she was trying, she's just fast. I think I had forgotten what trying to swim fast felt like? It doesn't feel super pleasant. xD I really have to get back to treating swim practice with some degree of seriousness. It's not supposed to feel pleasant lol.

Life is pretty standard otherwise. I may be reworking my schedule for next week depending on whether or not it stays cold, because I won't be able to get rides to practice later in the week so maybe it would be better for me to just take my swims at the Athletic Complex at night? We shall see. I'll take a look at the plans over the weekend. As for the rest of the day, there's a trainer ride in the plans this afternoon so I'll report back after that. Lecture is starting so I'm gonna peace out! (:

Much love,
Jess

Treadmill is a no go

[Day 21]

So I decided that swapping back and forth between the urg and the treadmill would be a pain, and I figured instead I would just do 5k of each thing and be done with it. I was little more aggressive on the urg today and was surprised that it was much harder than it felt yesterday. I don't really think I got my heart rate or breathing up very high yesterday, just kept it nice and smooth and comfortable, and today I was pulling a bit harder and it was actually a really great workout. The treadmill was a definite no though, I was really barely on it for like a minute before I could start to feel my leg getting unhappy so I just shut it down. I was on the wards shadowing in the morning and knew I was going to be on my feet a lot so I figured I couldn't afford to have my knee be irritated today. I think I'm going to just lay off the running this week and maybe see how things are doing next week. Ideally I think I want to not feel any pain when I push on that part of my knee before I test it out again, because I figure if I try to get back at it too early, I'll just end up aggravating it. Next spot on my calendar is Wednesday, but we'll see how the weekend plays out and take it from there.

I thought about doing something else for the remainder of the planned duration of my workout but I figured it would be nice just to come home and take care of some errands and work and whatever, so that's what I ended up doing. Here's the summary of my very short day!

Today's Workout: AM rowing (5k steady state, resistance of 7)
Summary:

• So I had to reset the machine halfway because the display paused for some reason, I have the numbers split because of that.
• 5075 m (3354/1721), 24:36 (16:21/8:15), 2:26.2-2:23.5 avg/500 m, 22-24 s/m

Hit Rate: 20/21 (95.2%)

Okay I need to like pay attention in class now.

Much love,

Jess

"I know 'cause my feet have the scars to show"

[Day 20B]

It's bedtime so we're gonna keep this brief.

Today's PM Workout: Trainer ride, more base work, a few sprints at the end
Summary:

• WU: 10 mins 
• Pre-set: 5 x :30/:30 spin ups 
• Main set: 
• 7 x (4 on/1:30 off) @ 95 rpm, 85 rpm, 75 rpm, 65 rpm, 75 rpm, 85 rpm, 95 rpm (started at threshold 95 rpm gear, called that base for the day, and added one gear for each drop in rpms)
• Extra 1:30 recovery 
• 2 x (5 x :45/:45 MAX sprints at base +1 over 100 rpm, 2 mins recovery) 
• WD: 7:30 mins easy 
• Totals: 19.07 mi, 1:20:26, 14.2 mph average

Hit Rate: 19/20 (95%)

Today was one of those days where I wanted to cry like 2 minutes into the warm up. Not even about the workout or whatever, I think it's just life things getting me down, but it was mentally rough. I had to turn off the podcast I had planned on listening to and just like be present with myself and focus and talk myself through it. Sometimes when I have days like this, I tell myself to just do 15 minutes and if I still feel horrible by then, I'll call it a day then and there. Things didn't get better by the 15 minute mark today but I felt really obligated to stick it out. I kept thinking about how in high school it didn't matter what else was going on in my life, I showed up to practice and stuck it out because that was what I was supposed to do. It's the kind of thing that taught me that I was deeper and stronger than I thought I was and that I could get through this kind of thing. I had done it before, so I knew I could do it today. (Hence the title quote.) I just felt like I'd be selling myself short if I just gave up to a bad mood so I kept with it and actually got in a real good quality workout.

I have an obscenely early morning tomorrow, even by my standards, so I'm gonna just leave it at that for tonight's update. (:

Much love,

Jess

PS - No knee pain with the cycling. I just rolled out and I can definitely feel the tightness in my right IT band versus my left and the twinge in the spot where I have pain when I press on it, so that's still there, but the cycling doesn't seem to aggravate it so I'm going to take that as a victory. The short 20 minute test treadmill run is still on for tomorrow. 

Finding detours

[Day 20A]

The thing about life is that it doesn't always go your way, but I have an honest belief that everything happens for a reason. I have to take it down a notch with the running to give my IT band some time to decompress and recover, so in the meantime I'm going to do all the other things that I can do and just be grateful that I have more time to dedicate to the rest of the things I don't typically have as much time to do. Today, I pulled out a variation of an old dryland workout (one of my first) from my age group days. The first time I had done it I was maybe 10 or 11 and we did four exercises (push ups, sit ups, dips, lunges). I typically sub in squats for lunges but since I was going to the gym today and had my pull cords handy, I decided to add in a fifth exercise. This was how it played out!

Today's AM Workout: Dryland circuit and rowing
Summary:

• Dryland circuit: 
• 10 rounds, :30 max reps of each exercise, :15 rest between exercises, 1:00 rest between rounds, 5:00 rest after round 5
• Exercises: push ups, sit ups, fly pull (cords), bodyweight squats, bench dips
• Round 1: 14/14/20/21/18
• Round 2: 15/13/19/21/20
• Round 3: 13/13/20/21/19
• Round 4: 14/14/20/20/19
• Round 5: 11/13/19/21/18
• 5 min rest
• Round 6: 14/13/21/21/19
• Round 7: 13/13/19/20/19
• Round 8: 12/14/19/20/17
• Round 9: 10/14/19/20/17
• Round 10: 11/14/20/21/19
• Totals: 127 push ups, 135 sit ups, 196 fly pulls, 206 squats, 185 dips 
• (This takes 48 minutes to do.)
• My biceps felt a little neglected in all of that, so I did a few rounds of single arm DB curls because some people tell me that muscular balance is important or something.
• 12/side @ 15 lbs/side, 8 @ 20 lbs, 7-5 @ 15 lbs, 12 @ 15 lbs
• My left wrist was giving me some amount of trouble, more joints I have to give time to get stronger.
• Rowing: 20 minutes steady state (Concept2, resistance set at 7)
• 4098 m, 20:43 total time, 2:31.5 average/500 m, 23 average s/m
• Do any of my rower friends know what stroke rate is supposed to be when you're rowing? I have no idea if I'm doing this right. 
• Total time: ~75 mins

Hit Rate: 18/19 (94.7%) - Note that I didn't dock myself a day for skipping the trainer ride last night. I did that mostly because I just ended up rearranging the rest of my week. It's going to be an 8-session week still if things go according to plan so I don't think it'll be a big deal. 

All in all, I'm pretty happy with how that went. The push up numbers aren't great and I definitely died a bit there towards the end, but it's something to work on. (Remember the 100 push ups for time thing a little while back that I added an entire minute on compared to like last year? Yeah, strength needs work.) It was nice to be back on an urg, I hadn't rowed in a while so it was nice to do switch it up and do something different today.

The plan is to hit the trainer in the afternoon today and see how my knee handles that. I did wear my knee sleeve all morning and the squats didn't bother it at all. It's been a tad bit achy while walking but nothing major that affects my biomechanics so I really don't mind. I've also taken a look at my schedule for the next few weeks and made some tweaks to try and ease up on the run mileage and intensity so I can try to keep these IT band flair ups at bay. Just have to be more patient and work back into it slowly. 

I also made a few adjustments to the rest of the week because an opportunity came up to shadow on the floors at Children's tomorrow, which means I have to be back from my morning workout in time for pre-rounds which means I can't swim in the morning tomorrow. (I don't have a ton of confidence in my ability to bike out to the pool at this point anyways, so it wasn't a huge loss to change that part of the schedule.) As of now, I think the plan for tomorrow will be to just get a one hour session in alternating 20 mins rowing, 20 mins easy treadmill running (only if the leg continues to feel good today), and another 20 mins rowing. Just some nice easy non-specific cardio while my body sorts itself out. 

Alright, time to get down to business with catching up on schoolwork!

Much love,

Jess

Knee update

[Day 19B]

So my right knee had a pretty major flare up on my walk to school today and has been hurting real bad since. I self-diagnosed on Uptodate and determined that I probably had ITBS (which, let's face it, every runner has, has had before, or will get, just like shoulder injuries in swimmers) which was later confirmed by a real life physician (hooray for going to school in a building of doctors) at a student health services appointment. So...that's a bummer. (Also, I've been to student health three times and they've all been for MSK issues this year. Can you tell that I don't do my maintenance work? Yeah, I can too...)

One of our lovely IM chief residents told me that I should probably take a week or two off and it'll probably resolve on its own, otherwise I should go see PT. Honestly though I don't know what PT can tell me that I don't already know. You can never be too strong in the lower abs and glutes, my feet pronate slightly still (even though they're way better now than they were say four years ago), I'm female, all of these things don't help my case with something like ITB. So I guess my plan is to take it day by day (because if I commit myself to taking a week off I'll probably die, I told Henry this earlier in the day, I have the patience of a squirrel on speed, and it's entirely true).

That starts with likely cutting out the ride today. Technically I think the cycling is not supposed to aggravate it too much (???) but given that I can't really walk without making my gait super weird I figure less is probably more today. Instead I'll take some time to roll out my legs and stretch tonight because the roller typically makes a big difference. The trend with this knee has been that I've woken up with it better in the morning, so another Naprosyn before bed tonight and hopefully things will just clear themselves up.

In other body-related news, my wrists are so loose. (Lol all my joints are just wrecked. They are like this all the time. Wish I had mom's magic joint stuff.) I'm a tad bit sore today but nothing bad, a little extra time to stretch will be nice though.

As for the plan moving forward: the original plan was to do a circuit dryland workout from my age group swimming days tomorrow in the morning and spend some time rowing because I haven't done that in a while and it's fun cross training. I might actually keep to that because I can bodyweight squat right now without my knee hurting at all and between that and rowing, it's no impact and doesn't simulate the kinds of movements that cause me pain, so it'll probably be fine. If it turns out that it's not fine and I have to pull the plug on it, I will. I'll assess how everything is doing during the day and decide if I want to take a trainer ride in the afternoon or something.

I think the big take home message from all of this is honestly that I have to be doing more maintenance work. Stretching and foam rolling and plyometrics and core work and stability work need to happen or I'm not going to be able to keep this little body of mine happy. But I hate that stuff. Halp. I think at this very moment, I'm willing to commit to the foam rolling thing and will let the rest of it play out from there. Let's see how the rest of this week goes.

Much love,
Jess

Lol what are knees...

[Day 19A]

Today's AM Workout: Treadmill interval run (and some semblance of core work)
Summary:

• WU: 1.5 mi @ 6.0-6.5 
• Main Set: 5 x 800/400 @ 7.0/6.0, 7.5/6.0, 8.0/6.0, 7.5/6.0, 7.0/6.0 
• I had originally planned on doing 6 repeats (doubling the top 8.0/6.0 interval), but my right knee wasn't feeling so hot the entire time so I brought it down a notch
• WD: ~0.25 mi to reach total of ~5.5 mi 
• I should have warmed down more...I got lazy...
• Treadmill numbers: 5.56 mi, 51:06
• Garmin numbers: 5.44 mi, 50:48, 9:20 average pace
• Core: 2 rounds of 30 leg lifts, 30 wrist to knee sit ups, and 50 Russian twists (med ball?), no rest within rounds, some arbitrary amount of rest between rounds.

Hit Rate: 17/18 (94.4%)

Notes/thoughts:

• So in some strange twist of events, while I was stretching after the run, I popped my left knee (the one that's prone to doing that) even though it was my right knee that hurt most of the run...so now I have two knees that both aren't doing fantastic but also both aren't doing so badly that I feel particularly inclined to change anything about my plans for them. It's awkward. We'll see how they hold up the rest of the day. I took a Naprosyn and hopefully that'll calm things down? (Before you go off on me about how bad NSAIDs are while training, I know, I know, but a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do.)
• I still do only roughly 50% of the core work I plan to do because it sucks and I have no discipline. ):
• The one upshot of this morning was that I didn't have breakfast planned or pre-made like I usually do, so I just threw some stuff together and actually had a super delicious wrap with cream cheese and cucumbers and deli chicken (with some eggs and chocolate milk) so that made me pretty happy.
• It's cold. Why is it so cold. It was literally warmer at Killington than it is here. Don't do this to me.

The status of the afternoon trainer ride is currently unclear. We'll see whether the knee issues resolve as the day goes on or gets worse. That'll probably be what decides it. I shall report back later. (Or if I don't, I will report back tomorrow, likely to tell you that I skipped the PM workout today. Hopefully that's not what ends up happening, but we shall see.)

Much love,

Jess

Oops...missed a day! D:

[Day 18]

Lol whoops, I guess I forgot about day 17 didn't I? The funny thing is, I keep this tab open on my browser with a draft for each day so that I don't forget to write a post. Amazingly enough, I did not open my computer all of yesterday, so I totally forgot that I had to do this. I guess my New Years Resolutions last just about as long as everyone else's. But one slip up is not the end of the world, we'll try not to do that again moving forward.

Updates from yesterday: We skied, it was awesome, I'm not really sure there's much more to say than that. I hit a few harder runs, got to be a little more aggressive with the skiing and the speed, it was a blast. There were some nasty ice patches, as to be expected from a mild day followed by a colder day, but it was blue skies and good visibility so honestly I'm not going to complain. Conditions were good by east coast standards. My right knee got a little sore by the end of the day and my left calf was tight basically the whole day, but other than that the body held up pretty well overall as well so I was happy about that. We got home not too late, ate out, generally had a blast, I forgot to blog, and that's about it!

We decided to go to the gym this morning because I had an afternoon flight out so we figured we'd have time. It was a bit of an early morning, but it was totally worth it. I really enjoy lifting with my other half, who humoured me today and let me call the shots about what we did. I mean there was some amount of negotiation about the details, but he definitely let me have my way for the most part. Having a spotter is so key. Also having rest intervals somewhat concretely dictated by my partner finishing his set also kept me honest. It was a long session but I had a blast and I'm glad I got a workout in on a day when I wasn't expecting to!

(Also as an aside: It's an amazing thing to have my goals supported by someone this way. I think it's really hard to try and be successful at anything all by yourself. It's definitely possible, but it's insanely hard and mad props to anyone who manages to make that happen. I for one know I wouldn't be where I am today without all the people who have supported me my entire life. And right now, it's really all Henry, who is willing to be the bad guy who kicks me out of the warmth of my bed in the morning on my lazy days and is willing to give up cozy long weekend Monday mornings in bed to go lift with me and is willing to run with me on the back half of my bricks because he knows that he's motivating. He is literally the definition of surrounding yourself with people who make you better. It's crazy to have someone lend so much of their strength and energy to help you achieve what you want to achieve. I have the best one-man support team in the world and he really does put this entire operation on his back. Okay end sappy #blessed moment.)

Today's Workout: Gym session, ~90 mins
Summary:

• Back squats: WU 12 @ 65 lbs, 5 x 8 @ 95 lbs
• Pulldowns: 3 x 12 @ 80 lbs
• Flat bench: WU 12 @ 45, 3 x 8 @ 75 lbs 
• Deadlifts: 3 x 8 @ 115 lbs
• Seated DB shoulder press: 12 @ 20 lbs/side, 8-12 @ 25-15 lbs/side, 5-8 @ 20-15 lbs/side
• Single-arm DB rows: 3 x 12 @ 35 lbs
• Walking lunges: 3 x 12/side @ 40 lbs (BB)
• Incline bench: 3 x 12 @ 55 lbs, last set split 6-6 because I never hit all the reps on this for some reason...
• Superset: 3 x 12/12
• Front raises w/ a 25 plate
• Lateral raises, 10 lbs/side (did the last set single arm leaning against a wall 12 @ 7.5 lbs)

Hit Rate: 16/17 (94.1%)

Notes/thoughts:

• Either reps are going up next week or weight is going up next week on those back squats...we shall see...
• I definitely took a shot at 85 lbs on the bench today b/c someone was there to spot me. Yeah no, not happening, that's basically 2RM weight for me. It's amazing the difference 10 lbs makes.
• The weight got real arbitrary on the shoulder press. Was just trying to see what I could do since it's been a while. I think the realistic goal going forward is 3 x 6/8-8 @ 25-15?
• Henry called out my momentum shit on the rows, which I have a reasonable defending argument for, but just to prove a point I did the last set of them strict and was reasonably surprised to find that I can in fact still hit all the reps that way. 
• I wish I was strong. But wishing that I was strong really doesn't get me anywhere, I just gotta keep doing what I'm doing and trusting in the process. I'll get better, I just need to give it time.
• I am tired and definitely feel a bit weak, but I don't feel terrible today. I have a reasonable amount of hope that I'll feel fine tomorrow morning, fingers crossed!

The plan for tomorrow is a treadmill run (and some core stuff...?) in the morning and a trainer ride in the afternoon. The run will be of 800 repeats at not very aggressive paces, just trying to ease back into running fast and working hard and all that jazz. The trainer ride will be a grab bag of random things, just trying to build fitness and keep it interesting all at the same time. The real problem in my life right now is that I took an awesome vacation and am now behind on literally everything else going on in my life. It'll take me a while to sort that out...Trying to hold onto the schedule while making the rest of my life happen this week will probably be tough. Some things might get dropped, some plans might get changed. We'll see though, I'm gonna do my best with this. Back to real life now! (:

Much love,

Jess

Killington day one and weekly recap!

[Day 16]

Not a ton to talk about today honestly. I'm out at Killington right now, shredding it up with Henry. Actually got to spend a lot of time working on the technicals today, doing less aggressive runs, working on short turns, skiing on bumps/moguls, doing things I don't typically do. Had a ton of fun just exploring and learning and getting better. I love skiing, it's been a fantastic day! It's good to be back on my own skis instead of rentals too. I've been running my short all mountain Rossignals today instead of my Atomics (there was some fresh snowfall overnight and in the morning so I figured the wider more versatile skis would be the better choice). Will probably keep with it for tomorrow because I'm actually enjoying the short turn radius.

The only thing I sort of feel bad about is the fact that I eat terribly when I'm on vacation. When it comes to skiing, I think it's just part of the experience. I like to be fueled by copious amounts of really fatty food and alcohol, because that's just what the ski life is. I need the extra calories to balance out the cold? Right? RIGHT? Lol it's only two days, I'll survive the lapse in reasonable food-related judgment for two days. xD

Some reflections on Week 2:

• 3 swims, 2 trainer rides, 1 run, 1 lift with a short run for a total of ~8.5-9 hrs.
• Slightly shorter week than last week, mostly because of the dropped late week double b/c of the knee. In general I have felt way better physically this week than the last, although the workout quality has been pretty comparable across the two weeks. 
• I actually amazingly have nothing really more significant to say about the week than that. Maybe it's because I'm distracted from dinner/drinking/PATRIOTS FOOTBALL (Pats leading 21-6 some amount of minutes into the third, Gronk just scored a TD) but you know. Whatever!

I've updated the "Current Project" page with the general training plan for the next few months if anyone wants to check that out. Other than that, I guess I shall return tomorrow with day two updates from Killington! (:

Much love,

Jess

Mind body dualism

[Day 15]

I used to think that brain tired and body tired were different things but they're really not. I was surprisingly exhausted this morning. I went to bed later than I wanted last night because I had a bunch of things to get sorted out at home before I leave for the weekend and I'm a little bit stressed out just because going away on vacation and taking a break from my perfectly controlled schedule is anxiety inducing for me. It really showed at practice I think, the focus just wasn't there, which made my swimming not great. I can't really tell if the big factor is my brain being tired from stress/less sleep than I would have liked or if my body is actually tired from the week of training (it doesn't feel like it necessarily? Also I don't feel like I did that much this week? But sometimes judgments/perceptions about this kind of thing can be deceiving). In any case, it all goes into the same bucket of tiredness at the end of the day so my point is this: stuff is going on, I needed to focus more during practice and I didn't today, I swam okay but I could've done better and would like to do better in the future.

On the upside, we had a nice full lane of some of my favourite girls today, so that was nice and fun. (I'm probably not supposed to have favourite lane mates? But these guys are particularly great and we blend well pace wise as a group and it just makes me happy to swim with them.) Also one of my teammates (a much faster one who swims in the fast lane) gave me a ride to and from practice today which was so key. I got to sleep in by like 15 minutes, it started raining on the drive home so if I had biked I would've gotten stranded or very very wet and I didn't, which I was very grateful for, it was just generally fantastic to be able to hitch a ride to practice. Here are the deets!

Today's Workout: AM CSP practice, IM day
Summary:

• WU: 500 free swim
• Main Set:
• 4 x 150 @ 2:40 as 100 free/50 kick IMO 
• 4 x 125 @ 2:10 as 75 free/50 drill IMO
• 4 x 100 @ 1:40 as 50 free/50 swim IMO
• 4 x 75 @ 1:20 as 25 free/50 swim IMO
• 300 kick w/ fins
• 200 swim w/ paddles and fins
• 3 x 100 IM @ 1:45
• 200 IM @ 3:30
• 100 IM @ 1:45
• 300 pull w/ paddles
• WD: 100 easy
• Total Distance: 3800 SCY

Hit Rate: 15/16 (93.7%)

Notes/thoughts:

• I need to start compiling a list of things about my swimming I need to work on, because it's a massive list and I should probably take time to go to the pool by myself at some point (semi-regularly hopefully?) and just try and hammer down on some of these details things. The big one today was when we swam with paddles (first time I've done that in a while), I was like, wow everything about my wrist entry is terrible. And my pull trajectory isn't great power-wise either. Many things to work on and try to translate into my actual freestyle. Also my fly kick and timing is so bad. I can sort of compensate for it nowadays because my pull is stronger, but that's no way to go about swimming that stroke. Need to be better about working on these things during practice, but I also really do need a dedicated drill/technique day or something, because I know that makes a huge difference. 

Honestly that one bullet point above is all the thought I am able to generate today. Brain so tired. Gonna get the house all ready to go and then head out to school now. Boston-bound in the PM! (:

Much love,
Jess

Gotta drop one eventually

[Day 14]

Workout notes first, then we'll talk life.

Today's Workout: AM CSP practice, sprint freestyle day
Summary:

• WU: 
• 400 swim
• 8 x 125 free DPS @ 1:55
• Main Set:
• 6 x 75 @ 1:10 as 50 mod/25 build to MAX
• 3 x 50 @ 1:10, odds MAX, evens easy recovery
• 5 x 100 kick w/ fins @ 1:30, 75 mix of choice and free kick on side/25 fly kick on back (exaggerate the undulation, fast beats)
• 12 x 50 @ :55, patterned as 4 cycles of 3
• 1 - break out
• 2 - fast turn
• 3 - break in
• 500 swim moderate, focus on streamlines (not even the dolphin kicks, just tight streamlines)
• 50 MAX (I went a :34, it was pretty pathetic)
• WD: 150 easy
• Total Distance: 3800 SCY

Hit Rate: 14/14 (100%)

Notes/thoughts:

• My left shoulder was a little bit weird today, just some pulling on the rotator cuff on the return to neutral after breaths to my right. The shoulder itself has also just been pretty sore/tight the remainder of the day. Not really sure what the deal is. Alignment is probably a little bit off on the rotation. Everything about my rotation in freestyle needs work.
• I've been trying to get back to a nice bent arm recovery in freestyle. I like the versatility of knowing I can swim with a straight arm recovery (my turnover is quicker, I have more stability in choppy water, the power phase of my pull is a bit stronger, etc. etc.) but it's less efficient, I have a bit more hand entry to pull lag than I'd like, and it's probably not great for my rotator cuff in the long run. I want to know I can swim well with either type of recovery so I gotta get back to working on the nice smooth bent arm recoveries. 
• I miss details work. The one thing that irks me about triathlon swimming is that it seems to be such a massive raw fitness based thing sometimes and just slamming out a lot of yards is not my style. I miss getting to work on the little things, body position, pull technique, clean turns and underwaters, etc. so it was nice to have some of that today. 
• I don't understand why I am so slow in the pool right now. Part of it is definitely technical. I can feel all the ways in which my body position sucks and how my kick is somehow still not properly synced up with my pull, which is all frustrating, but I think beyond that I just lost a bunch of my higher gears and I don't know how to get them back other than showing up in the pool and just doing my thing and hoping to find my groove. I'm doing 100s at a pace slower than I've swum a pool mile alone during rec swim before. It's not even sensible. But whatever, I have pool problems all the time, and the only way to solve them is really by swimming more, so I'll keep doing that and hopefully something will click back into place at some point.
• The bike out was okay today, temp was cold but no wind which was nice. I need to get a full facemask or something to help my face stay warm, maybe I'll buy one when I go skiing this weekend, that way I can maybe convince myself to go ride my road bike outside on the weekends too. (Wind is an inevitable thing at faster speeds and having nothing to cover my cheeks is super brutal.)

So today was a planned double day, but a few things are going on that made me decide to axe workout two today. The big one is that my right knee spent most of yesterday having a horrible time. There was a point when I was leaving school and going down the stairs and my knee was just collapsing underneath me because it hurt, so I think I need to give it a moment. I woke up this morning with it feeling perfectly fine except for the occasional twinge when I twist/pivot or move laterally but the joint feels loose when I'm taking steps and with skiing over the weekend, I'm just not comfortable risking anything with it. The plan had been an outdoor run today and a treadmill workout plus some dryland tomorrow morning, but I decided to opt out of the afternoon workout today and will be swimming tomorrow morning instead just to keep things low impact. It may even be a no breaststroke kick day (it's IM day tomorrow), depending on how my knee handles things.

(Another random thing to note: All of my joints have felt real loose the past week or so in general. It's a bit weird, but it's in my knees and my wrists and my elbows and I really wish I had some of that joint stuff my mom takes because I bet it would be helpful. But oh well. I guess I'll just like...drink milk and eat food instead and let it resolve on its own.)

That having been said, I get to knock myself for the first time all year for missing a workout. This situation is one where I would typically consider whether or not I wanted it to count against me, because I am taking the afternoon off for a legitimate reason and I don't want to feel compelled to ignore legitimate reasons to take time off just because I want this hit rate number to look good. At the same time, I want to be able to look back on this number at the end of the season and have it actually reflect an accurate comparison of what I did accomplish versus what I wanted to accomplish in terms of training. So, in the interest of keeping things honest, I'm counting the workout for what it is: a missed workout. I will continue to just keep making random judgment calls about what counts and what doesn't as situations arise in the future. In the meantime...

Hit Rate: 14/15 (93%) - Also, for everyone that's new to this, the goal is to keep that percentage above 90% (and I always round down, deal with it) in an ideal world, but I am willing to accept it getting down even lower (~85% is okay, below 80% becomes not so okay) because life happens.

I should go address everything else I've been putting off in my life now. This is the crazy thing about having all this extra time from forgoing a workout: I waste literally 100% of it and end up just as time crunched as I always am. Swim tomorrow, Boston-bound in the afternoon after that, can't wait to see my other half and HIT UP KILLINGTON THIS WEEKEND. Yay (:

Much love,

Jess

"It will settle"

[Day 13]

Title quote is from Chrissie Wellington, retrieved from a magazine I was reading over breakfast this morning. Pretty much sums up how things felt during the workout today so I thought it was fitting.

Today's Workout: AM treadmill run (one big long continuous hill) + core
Summary:

• Run:
• WU: 1.5 mi @ 6.0-6.2, 2% 
• Main Set: all at 6.2 mph, 1.0 mi @ 3%, 0.75 mi @ 4%, 0.50 mi @ 5%, 0.20 @ 6%
• WD: 1.0 mi @ 6.0, 2%
• Treadmill summary: 5.07 mi, 50:05
• Garmin summary: 5.24 mi, 49:56, 9:32 pace
• Post-run core: 
• 50-30-20 shoulder touch planks
• 30-30 leg lifts
• 10-10 PT lying leg extensions (R/L)
• Plank series: 1:30/0:45/0:45/1:30 w/ 30 SR b/w
• 10 four count sit ups

Hit Rate: 13/13 (100%)

Notes/thoughts:

• It will settle: every time I upped the incline today I had a moment where my brain was just like, ugh I have to do how much more of this? And then we're gonna bring it up again? But the beauty of endurance work is that you always settle into it, you just have to give it time. I really felt that today. It's a good mantra to keep in mind when things feel off kilter early on in any workout/interval/whatever it may be. 
• Definitely still overreaching every time I plan a workout. I was like, oh I've never really done hill work on a treadmill before (other than that one dabble into a preprogrammed hill run on the treadmill the one random day) so let's try something new today. Let's not do actual intervals because I don't want to be too aggressive. And I found this cool thing that was like a continuous hill pyramid and thought, yay perfect for the base weeks! Except I'm totally not a good enough runner to do this as a pyramid yet. xD Sooooo instead I took it as a ladder. Worked my way up today. Will hopefully be able to work my way down too next time? And then we can work on inching up that pace? We'll see. I've got things to work towards.
• I really need someone cracking the whip on the core work. I did some amount of it but honestly I didn't put in that much effort. Really lack discipline with the core stuff, especially when it comes to planking. It's one of those things where I need someone else to be holding the stopwatch and pestering me about form otherwise it just doesn't get done right. (Notice that I went for a 1:30 based set instead of the typical 2:00 based set...yeah...) It sucks that this is actually important to me being better at the other stuff because I dislike core work so much. I am trying and I guess not doing as much as I should be is still better than doing nothing...but I still really just need someone to glare at me and tell me to actually do the work when it comes to this. (Henry? Sunday after we get back from Killington? Just make me do it?)
• Henry had to do some work to kick my sorry butt out of bed this morning. I really just wanted to sleep in. But he made me get up and got me to the gym where I subsequently got to do my thing so that was nice. 
• My right knee was bothering me a bit today again during the run, and it's been intermittently painful throughout the morning, so that's something to watch out for. Especially seeing as I'm skiing over the weekend, the knee health will be pretty pivotal to everything.
• Did Garmin update their software? Because my accelerometer numbers this week have looked really different than they used to look and nothing has really changed about the treadmills or my running I don't think...we'll see if the change trends continue. I reserve judgment until a later time. 
• Cadence was still low on average today (169 spm). I had some good stretches in the middle of higher cadence running though, so that's a step in the right direction. Probably taking a run outside tomorrow so hopefully those numbers will give me a better indication of what the deal with cadence is right now. 

In other news, I took some time for myself this morning. Just like didn't do anything I was supposed to do, took a bath, watched some random videos (including this which got me real pumped about skiing over the long weekend), laid around in bed, it was fantastic. I haven't done much of that the past week and a half, low pressure me time was much needed. Some days I don't take well to needing down time and like spend the entire time fretting and being a little crazy. Today though, I felt like I deserved it and it was time well spent so I'm not living with as much angst as I usually am after blowing off responsibilities for an entire morning. Now I have to actually go address the realities of my life though lol. At least I'm already done with all the training I have to do today? And it was a short workout at that?

Two sessions on the books for tomorrow: a morning swim and an afternoon run (hopefully outdoors). Fingers crossed for warmer weather and NO WIND (because I have to bike out/back in the morning). Okay gonna go get my undercut trimmed up now. (:

Much love,

Jess

"What breaks your bones..."

[Day 12B]

"...is not the load you're carrying. What breaks you down is all in how you carry." - The Fray

How amazing is that line? The song came on (thank you shuffle!) during my walk home today (on my way to this workout!) and I was like wow that's amazing. I need to share this. And for all of you readers out there (so...all two of you...), if you ever catch me freaking out about my life, please direct me back to this quote thank you very much.

Also if you listen to the rest of the song and think that it's really sad, remember that it ends like this:

"Loneliness has always been with me, with me
Maybe we were meant to be on our own
But I got to try or it will destroy me
Cause maybe we don't have to be all alone"

It's not sad, it's amazing.

Oh and before we get into the real meat of the post: One of my fellow M1s mentioned my blog today while we were in class and I hit her up about it afterwards but I wanted to extend an invitation to anyone else who is reading as well (again, all two of you). I am always up for people joining me on workouts! Doesn't matter if you haven't worked out in forever (or ever) or if you're super hardcore and way more intense than me, I'm always up for a buddy for workouts. Just hit me up! (:

Anyways. Here's part two of the double!

Today's PM Workout: Trainer ride, a grab bag of some steady state efforts and max efforts
Summary:

• WU: 10 mins easy, 5 x :30/:30 spin ups 
• Main Set: 
• 2 x 10/2 @ 95+ rpm working
• 2 x 5/2 @ 95+ rpm working 
• 1 min extra recovery 
• 2 x (5 x :45/:45 MAX sprints, 2 mins recovery) 
• WD: 7 mins easy 
• Total: 19.14 mi, 1:20:07, 14.3 mph

Hit Rate: 12/12 (100%)

Notes/thoughts:

• Regarding the workout: the 10 and 5 minute intervals were at whatever resistance I felt like I could hold throughout the set. Wasn't worried so much about it being difficult as I was about just getting smooth and really being above 95 rpm (because I've done a lot in the 90-95 zone recently where I seem to be more comfortable but I wanted to work at the higher cadences a bit). Brought it up two gears for the max efforts, tried to be above 100 rpm on those but inevitably fell as the set wore on. It was nice to just tear out really hard full on efforts though, I haven't done that in a while (in any of the sports or in the gym really) so that was a total blast. Surprising, because I was sort of dreading those, but they were actually super awesome. (They were also short intervals, I gave myself those extra 2 minutes recovery in the middle, blah blah blah but let's not step on my moment.)
• Just a side note: I know a lot of people without power meters like to try to use trainer speed as a proxy for power, but that's terrible. I don't even know why I keep those distance and speed numbers in my summary, because honestly I think that really depends on how tight I tighten the flywheel on my trainer on that particular day. Pretty sure the numbers can't vary that much day to day. (I do most of my trainer rides off feel, I've been swimming long enough to have a good sense for effort and I don't mind training by effort, especially given that's how I race.)
• Fun story: I hilariously spilled a ton of water on myself during one of my longer recovery intervals today. I know that it takes me more than a single bottle of water to get through any trainer ride longer than 60 minutes, but I never poor myself more than a bottle, I always just leave my Brita filter next to me, which is stupid. So today when I went to refill, I totally just like poured it all over myself because that's what happens when you're tired and dehydrated in the middle of a workout. Lesson learned? We shall see the next time I ride...
• Random thought: The step counter on my Garmin can be so obnoxious. Some days it's like "you didn't hit your goal today" and I'm over here trying to explain to it that I did two workouts but it doesn't understand that because they weren't walking based workouts. -sigh-
• No drill set today. Mainly because I didn't want to be on the trainer for more than 80 minutes (those minutes will come up as we get into the thick of things in the next few months, I'm in no rush for longer trainer days). I'm going to keep trying to integrate that at the end of my workouts though, I do think it's important and I do think it makes a difference to my riding. 
• A quick update about early morning thoughts: I will keep my second swim this week on Thursday morning instead of Friday, just logistically easier given the rest of my schedule, so I guess no more free rides for me this week...Will be biking to practice on Thursday. Fingers crossed for warmer weather and no wind!
• I've been listening to this awesome new podcast called Swimcerely with Spindrift. I usually listen to a podcast during my trainer rides, usually something sport related (some of my favourites are this one, Endurance Planet, Pursuing Health with Julie Foucher, Winging it in Motown, some old series of podcasts from like 2014 involving a lot of pretty big name triathlete interviews that I've forgotten the name of, etc.) and I just wanted to give this one a shout-out because it's competitive swimmer specific and I figure there might be some other people who would like checking it out. It's fantastic. I'll just leave it at that. 
• Body still feels good mostly, not too much change, some amount of upper body soreness, back really starting to kick in but it's just muscles being tight. I've been stretching/foam rolling throughout the day and I actually think the bike has helped loosen up my back a bit. (People don't typically say that, but hey, apparently it's happening right now.)

Today was a good day, weirdly enough. It started on such a "meh" kind of note and I did the whole carrying on thing and I'm really happy with how it all turned out in the end. A lot of validation for that whole "action is always the cure for doubt" idea. I mean it wasn't a perfect day, but it was good. I'm happy with it. I'm proud. It's nice because I ended yesterday on such a disappointing note. I'm glad I'm in a better place tonight.

As for tomorrow, only one workout on the books, a morning treadmill run done as a big long continuous hill climb (lol we'll see how that goes) and some core work following (please do it future Jess please please please I know you hate this but please do it). I'm gonna shower and eat and stretch and roll out and hopefully get some more reviewing done (yay med school...) and then hit the sack! Have a good evening all! (:

Much love,
Jess