Transitions

I am letting myself go lol. And it's not a bad thing. I think I need to learn to let myself go if I'm going to do the rest of my life and really be happy. Achieving stuff is pretty cool. This year and everything that's gone into it and how much I've improved has been really cool. But I want to feel like I have control over my life. I want to feel like I can make choices about what I do and don't do on any given day. I want to take a little bit of pressure off of myself and be a little bit happier than I usually am.

So really what I'm saying is I've been training less. I'm sort of throwing the plan out the window. And unfortunately with that goes a lot of the goals. I'm not expecting to run very fast at the 10k because despite the fact that I'm supposed to be in peak training weeks right now, I've taken four straight days off from training (and 6 off from running). I'm doing life instead and I love it and I'm willing to sacrifice a good 10k time to just do life instead. It's weird, this isn't how I usually roll, but I think it's something I needed to come to terms with and I'm glad I'm doing it.

I think the other responsibility I'm going to drop for a little while is this blog. It's been fun and it's been really meaningful and helpful to have a place to reflect on training and voice my frustrations and record everything I've accomplished and to let myself be proud of how far I've come. But I guess without really concrete goals and without me being really committed to something right now, it seems like a bit of a time sink that I don't need. I'll keep logging the way I used to, in short form locally on my computer, but I think I'm going to let the daily blogging fall away for a while. I'll probably be back at some point, but I don't know when or why. I'm sure I'll know when the time is right. For now, I'm going to go on a new adventure of finding the new balance in my life now that all the priorities have shifted. Wish me luck. (:

Much love,
Jess

No apologies...

[Day 160]

...For being missing for a few days this time. I was busy enjoying my weekend and I don't do that often enough so I'm glad I just let myself go and did whatever this weekend. And then I started work on Monday so things have been busy managing life and real work hours. That having been said, I do owe you/myself some training/race updates so let's get to it! (:

Skipped the swim on Friday morning because I had cramps Thursday night and wasn't sleeping well, took the Friday evening interval workout as planned, did a way better job than I thought I would and was really happy about that.

Friday's Workout: PM interval run, main set of 2 x 1 mi @ 10k pace (7:35-7:50) w/ 3 mins rest, 3-4 x ½ mi @ 5k pace (7:05-7:20) w/ 3 mins rest (walking rests)
Summary:

• Totals: 7.27 mi, 1:11:23, 9:50 average pace
• 1 mi splits: 7:40.2, 7:38.4
• 1/2 mi splits: 3:35.6 (7:11), 3:37.4 (7:15), 3:34.9 (7:10), 3:36.4 (7:13)

Hit Rate: 21/28 (75%)

Took Saturday off as planned so I could be ready to try and run fast on Sunday! At which I was sort of successful. Went a 23:17 (official time), which wasn't what I had hoped it would be (was aiming for a 22 something) but I feel okay about it. Aimed high, fell short, still came away with a PB which I'm not gonna complain about.

Sunday's race official: 5k, 23:17, 7:30 pace

Sunday's race via Garmin: 3.14 mi, 23:24, 7:27 pace, 182 spm average

Pace splits by mile: 7:24, 7:22, 7:42, 6:36

Hit Rate: 22/29 (75.8%)

Thoughts about the race: It was harder than I thought it was gonna be. It was a rainy cool day, which played to my advantage, no wind which was good, but I just didn't have enough in me for the third mile. The first mile felt strong, the second mile took a little pushing to hold pace and I really genuinely thought I could sustain that effort through mile three but I just didn't have it. I think I did mentally quit a little bit when it got tough and I settled for something in the 7:40 range when I probably shouldn't have, but really there was genuinely not much left in my legs at that point. Henry has a wonderful (read: awful) finish line photo of me and the look on my face is just such a disaster. I push my jaw forward when I'm in a lot of pain because it helps me restrict the tension to my face so it doesn't tighten up my shoulders when I'm running, but it looks so terrible, you can tell I'm just absolutely dying. In any case, it was what I had to give. 

For reference, when I ran this race last year, my splits were 7:25, 7:43, 7:50 so I was able to really improve on that seeing as I can hold that first mile pace for another mile now. The next time we do this (early July), the goal will be to see it through for all three miles. We'll see how it goes. For now, I'll take the PB and move on.

Monday's Workout: AM easy/base run, 8 mi

Summary: 8.44 mi, 1:23:53, 9:56 pace, 172 spm

Pace splits by mile: 10:08, 10:12, 10:12, 10:04, 9:55, 9:49, 9:43, 9:48, 9:07

Hit Rate: 23/30 (76.6%)

This one felt bad. It was a fasted morning workout the day after a race, what was I expecting really? I just felt sluggish the whole way, it felt like a struggle just finishing, although the splits will speak to the fact that I did seem to get warmer after the first four miles and things were incrementally improving as the run went on. In any case, it was just a run I took to get some more miles in, and that was all I needed from it.

Tuesday's Workout: AM CMSC practice, mid-distance free day

Summary:

• WU: 400 swim, 3 x 100 swim
• Pre-set: 4 x 150 @ 10-15 SR, 50 kk/50 dr/50 sw
• Main Set:
• 6 x 50 @ 10SR, odds build to 80%, evens hold 80%
• 3 x 200 @ base (3:10), descend 1-3
• 4 x 50 @ 10SR, odds build to 80%, evens hold 80%
• 3 x 200 @ base +5 (3:20), descend 1-3
• 2 x 50 @ 10SR, odds build to 80%, evens hold 80%
• 1 x 200 @ base +10 (3:30) - this was 3 x 200, descend 1-3 as written but we ran out of time
• WD: 100 easy
• Total Distance: 3400 LCM

Hit Rate: 24/31 (77.4%)

I was not a happy camper about going to this practice. I had been really emotionally upset about a lot of things the night before, although Henry did eventually get me to sleep. I didn't get a ton of sleep, I had actually planned on not going, but I woke up around 4:50 and I would've felt awful if I just went back to sleep so I sucked it up and went to practice. I really wasn't feeling it at all. I swam in the 1:35 base lane, turns out that the pace times are fine although everyone in the lane is super super fast which made me feel kind of crappy because I just like hung off the back 10-15 seconds behind everyone else and it's sort of obvious that I'm really slow. I couldn't really find a good excuse to leave the lane though. Honestly the slower lane is just way too slow and it wasn't like I was missing pace times or getting lapped so I felt like I just needed to suck up my pride and put my head down and do the work. 

In reality though "doing the work" was really just finishing. I didn't try that hard, I didn't actually descend anything, I just swam and made the pace times and that's all I did. I actually really wanted to leave like pretty much immediately after the warm up, and I kept saying to myself, "Okay I'll leave after this set", but I never did. I just kept saying it after each little bit of the set and at some point it was like, "Oh it's actually time to leave". So yeah, I got through it somehow. Only other notable thing was that I had that right shoulder kink again during warm up, but it actually didn't bother me at all during the set (my swimming was probably higher quality during the set), so hopefully it stays better.

This morning I skipped practice, just didn't feel like going, so this is happening...Hit Rate: 24/32 (75%) And this PM, I took a run!

Today's Workout: PM base run

Summary: 8.42 mi, 1:14:21, 8:50 pace, 173 spm average

Pace splits by mile: 8:55, 8:51, 9:03, 8:56, 8:45, 8:47, 8:48, 8:55, 7:55

Hit Rate: 25/33 (75.7%)

This was supposed to be a tempo run, but I've decided that I really don't care. There is so much in the world that I do care about and feeling the weight of expectations tethered to all of my workouts was really getting to me. I would like to go back to that phase of my college club swim career where all I did was show up to as many practices as was reasonable given whatever else was going on in my life and racing on random weekends knowing I was going to swim terribly and actually swimming terribly and having a blast doing it anyways. I want to be fit enough to race and enjoy the experience of racing. Improving and dropping time and winning things on the occasion is fantastic, but it takes so much out of me in order to do that. Sometimes you just have to decide when things aren't worth it anymore. I want to have mental and physical energy to put towards my clinic work and my studying and the time I have to spend with Henry and friends. I want my life to drift a little more closer to normal because I've been getting tastes of it here and there recently and I really like that. I want to keep racing and training because I love it, but I don't want either of those things to feel like a chore. It was starting to feel like a chore. So I'm gonna drop the expectations and the run training plan and just swim and run and try to do things because they're good for me and because I love them. I've never been good at that, but I'm gonna try. I'll still keep "planning" in the sense that I'll pen things into the calendar ahead of time because if I have no structure I'll just spend all my time napping, but it'll be flexible and there will be no demands on the kinds of workouts I have to do. Gonna keep working on that whole balance thing.

In any case, with regards to the actual run today, it felt sort of interesting...I knew it was a comfortable pace mentally just from the info I was getting from my legs and from my heart rate and breathing rate and what not, but it really never felt comfortable. I have a bit of a head cold so my nose is simultaneously really runny while feeling really dry and I've been coughing so my airway is a little irritated and the end result is that I think that's why I never got comfortable. It's hard to be comfortable with a head cold. The weather was cool though and the pace was quick in a very relaxed way and I was surprised that I was able to take a run at this kind of distance at this kind of pace and have it feel as good as it did. I really hope that's not an anomalous thing, I really hope my natural running pace is just coming up bit by bit. It'll take a lot of time to sort that out though, I'll try not to read too much into one run.

The plan as of right now for tomorrow is morning swim practice and a run with Henry in the evening. We'll see what actually happens. Happy Wednesday! (:

Much love,

Jess

Taking an extra day off

[Day 154]

After some talk about it with Henry last night, we decided to forgo running today. I need the extra recovery day, I wanna do well this Sunday, that involves actually being rested so I'm going to rest today. I will count it against the hit rate, but I won't count it against my chain/streak thing because I do think I'm making the right decision. Be back tomorrow. (:

Hit Rate: 20/26 (76.9%)

Much love,
Jess

Sometimes I need to listen to my body more

[Day 153B]

So there are these two completely conflicting things that I find myself saying to myself a lot:

"Start where you are, not where you want to be." - for when I get too aggressive and try to do too much too fast.

"Bite off more than you can chew and chew it." - for when I'm scared of what I have planned and I need a little jolt of motivation.

I'm really bad at toeing the line between these two sentiments though. Inevitably I just spend all my time swinging too far from one end to the other and the balance seems like it's never there. But I think I'm starting to realize that balance isn't a thing anyone has perfected from day 1 when they draw up their plans. Every time I make plans I find myself changing them precisely because things feel off-balance and I need to get myself back on track. Today was life reminding me that I'm veering too far in one direction and I have to center myself again.

I'm not recovered. You'd think that'd be obvious to me given the fact that I don't really sleep through the night because of the nagging pain in my legs but no. I gave what I had to that tempo run and boy was it rough. The first 2 miles at HM pace were actually pretty solid, legs felt heavy but the pace wasn't hard to find or hold. As soon as I tried to hit the 10k pace mile though, things just fell apart. To the point where when I did finally decide that there was no way I was going to be able to do the rest of the workout and I should just run home at whatever pace I felt like, I couldn't even keep myself running at faster than 10:30 pace AND I was taking walking breaks. It was a rough day. I got ambitious this week with the residual soreness from the weekend combined with adding swimming back into my schedule and it wasn't prudent to be doing what I was doing but I did it anyways. Now I know I have to step back. And I have to go back to my calendar for the summer and re-plan things out in a way that will allow me to get the most out of my job and my training and the time I have here in Boston. And the way to do that is definitely not the way I've been going about it right now. Will have to figure out where the right balance is.

Today's PM Workout: A planned tempo run that sort of devolved into do whatever you can, logged as 6 miles in an hour, there was a good 2 mi pick up at HM pace (~8:20) in there.
Hit Rate: 20/25 (80%)

I needed a wake up call. Life gave it to me. Re-vamped schedule for the week involves not doing stadiums tomorrow and taking an easy short run with Henry in the AM instead. Then swim practice and an interval workout on Friday, Saturday off, and race day Sunday! Yay!

Much love,
Jess

All I do is sleep

[Day 153]

Things accomplished today: Woke up, went to practice, came home, ate breakfast, promptly fell back into bed and just woke up again. Good job Jess lol. Doubled up yesterday, so here's the summary from yesterday and today!

Yesterday's PM Workout: Easy run, 4 mi
Summary: 4.34 mi, 42:00, 9:40 pace, 176 spm
Pace splits by mile: 10:05, 9:29, 9:53, 9:41, 8:21
Hit Rate: 18/23 (78.2%)

This was way harder than I thought it was going to be. My legs just didn't feel with it, it was a struggle for most of the way until we did a little pick up push at the end of the run. Henry pretty much pulled me the entire time. I know he has a much easier time running with me when I'm beside him but I spent a lot of the run tucked in behind him because my legs just didn't feel like they could go any faster. It was rough. But whatever, we got it done.

Today's AM Workout: CMSC practice, IM day
Summary:

• WU: 400 swim, 3 x 100 swim
• Main Set: I have no idea what any of the pace times were, I was just going last and leaving 5 off the person in front of me...
• 4 x 150 @ base + :10/:15, 100 fly/50 back, 100 back/50 breast, 100 breast/50 free, 100 free/50 fly
• 4 x 100 @ base + :10/:15, 50 build stroke/50 recovery choice
• 4 x 50 @ base + :10, 15 underwater fast/35 recovery choice
• (break)
• 4 x 150 rolling IM @ base + :10/:15 (pretty sure these were on the 2:50?)
• 4 x 100 @ base + :10/:15, 25 stroke FAST/25 recovery choice (pretty sure these were on the 1:50?)
• 4 x 50 @ base + :10, 35 moderate/15 sprint to the finish (pretty sure these were on the :55?)
• Did these 1-3 free as written, 4 easy b/c ran out of time lol
• Total Distance: 3100 LCM

Hit Rate: 19/24 (79.1%)

Swam a lane up today, was definitely the slowest in the lane and really hope I wasn't ticking my lane mates off by being too slow. They seemed fine though, they left on whatever interval they were doing and for the most part I made all the pace times so I wasn't really holding people up I don't think. And I wasn't THAT much slower than the second slowest person in the lane lol. I'm gonna try to stick it out and see how things go with swimming in this lane. I don't even know what base pace they were using, but whatever it was, it worked for today.

I'm feeling stronger in the pool than I was expecting to. I mean long course fly is non-trivial but I managed to make an okay go of it. I had some pain in my right shoulder today but it's because my hand tends to deviate outwards on my freestyle catch, especially when I'm breathing to the left. If I'm careful about my freestyle form, my shoulder holds up fine, so I guess it's a good thing that it nags at me when I swim poorly. 

My legs are less sore today than they were yesterday for sure, but they're still keeping me up at night and they're definitely far from perfect. Gonna try and take that tempo run today, I feel pretty confident in my ability to at least hit the HM pace intervals, but less sure about those 10k pace intervals...just gotta remind myself that how I feel is probably not gonna be an accurate reflection of what my body is capable of and I just have to not freak out and focus on holding good form and get after it even if it seems way harder than it should be. Hopefully things will go alright. I'll report back in the PM.

Much love,

Jess

Back to CMSC (:

[Day 152]

Today's Workout: AM CMSC practice, mid-distance free day (test set day)
Summary:

• WU: 400 free, 3 x 100 free
• Pre-Set:
• 300 as 25 kick/25 drill/50 swim
• 4 x 150 free @ 10SR, 50 easy/50 build/50 cruise 
• Main Set:
• Test set of 10 x 100 free @ 1:40 (made them, yay!)
• 100 easy
• 2 x 200 free @ 3:30
• WD: 100 easy
• Total Distance: 3200 LCM

Hit Rate: 17/22 (77.2%)

Went to master's! Swam a lane down from where I usually swim, but will probably be moving back up tomorrow because I led the lane and I think they normally swim on a 1:45 base pace which feels a tad slow (even though 1:35 or 1:40 would be super challenging based on where I am right now, I think it'd be worth it to go back up a lane and try and hang with the faster swimmers). I don't feel as out of shape as I was expecting to, honestly the stroke felt strong, my legs which are completely non-functional on land presently actually did pretty well in the water, all in all I'm really happy with it. Long course will take some adjusting to, the pool feels endless and sometimes I don't stay focused the entire length and my form really drops off towards the end of each 50. I'll just have to figure out a way to cue myself back into focusing on my swimming since there's no wall at the 25 to help me reset. But yeah, it was a good way to get back in the pool. Hopefully I'll keep that up.

The plan was originally to take a tempo run today but I think I'm gonna swap today's run for tomorrow's because my legs definitely aren't up for it yet and I want to hit that workout right. Will take something short/easy with Henry today and try and hit the tempo run tomorrow instead. Trying to keep quality the priority. 

Much love,

Jess

Falling off the radar

[Day 151]

Exams will do that to you! I am pleased to report that I did in fact survive exam week. As of yet it is not officially known whether or not I actually passed all my exams, but I think I did fine, so I will just pretend that I did pass and that I am done with first year of med school for real. I came out to Boston on Thursday after my last exam and have been mostly adventuring with Henry. We went paddleboarding on Friday, hiking on Saturday, and ran stadiums with Tony and went to a movie yesterday! It's been good. I'm not gonna bother logging paddleboarding and hiking here, although it's up on Garmin Connect if anyone really cares. Here are the rest of the updates:

Yesterday's Workout: AM stadiums (~1/2 of Harvard stadium) + dryland circuit (5 rounds)
Summary: dryland reps

• Push ups: 19, 16, 14, 14, 15 (78 total)
• Sit ups: 14, 15, 14, 14, 14 (71 total)
• Dips: 24, 21, 22, 24, 23 (114 total)
• Squats: 21, 21, 21, 22, 22 (107 total)

Hit Rate: 15/20 (3 skipped exam week workouts; 75%)

Today's Workout: PM easy run, 4-5 mi

Summary: 4.88 mi, 43:38, 8:56 pace, 175 spm

Pace splits by mile: 9:21, 8:56, 8:45, 9:00, 8:34

Hit Rate: 16/21 (76.1%)

Notes/thoughts:

• I'm really sore today. Really hoping that fixes itself by tomorrow because I have a tough tempo run on the books (and I'm planning on swimming in the morning, so it'll also be a double day) and I'd like my legs to be functional for that. 
• The Harvard stadium is brutal. They were not kidding. I'm gonna try and work on that while I'm here, good way to try and keep some power/kick in my legs for the cycling while I'm away from my actual bike.
• For some reason my body was like, RUN FASTER RUN FASTER my entire run today. I was gonna go for an easy 9:30-10:00 paced run and the entire time my brain/heart/lungs were like ew this is too fast what are we doing but my body was like, nah this is good let's keep going. It was bizarre. But I guess that instinct is also exactly why I do what I do. Sometimes I think at the core of who I am is just this sort of crazy inexplicable desire to go faster all the time. I guess that's why I keep at it. 

So yup, master's swim practice in the AM tomorrow and a tempo run in the PM. Wish me luck! (And happier legs!)

Much love,

Jess

Easy run

[Day 142]

I think this may be the last workout I get in before I head to Boston. Things are getting real crazy with exam week stuff, so good luck me...Took an easy 6 miler today, ran with Brian, he was struggling a little bit (maybe b/c it was warm? maybe because it was early? idk) so we took it slow. He made it though, which is good and fairly impressive because he didn't sound like he was doing too hot. I also honestly wasn't feeling great the first 3-4 miles, but things settled down for me in the last 2 and they felt real smooth and real easy, so I don't really know what the deal was with that either. In any case, here are the deets.

Today's Workout: Easy 6 miler
Summary: 6.13 mi, 59:41, 9:44 pace, 175 spm average, not gonna worry about the splits today b/c it's late and they don't really matter lol
Hit Rate: 14/16 (87.5%) - this is about to plummet...loooool

Beeeeed time. Happy Saturday! (:

Much love,
Jess

Sometimes I run fast!

[Day 141]

Took an interval run today. Needed more sleep last night lol. Opted to walk the 1/4 mile recovery intervals, no regrets on that front because the running was spectacular. I'm finally starting to see run training sort of like swim training and things are falling into place in a way I really wasn't expecting. Details first, then thoughts.

Today's Workout: Interval run, 4 x 1/2 mi @ 10k-5k pace descending (under 7:45/7:40/7:35/7:30) w/ 3 mins rest (jogging), 8 x 1/4 mi @ 5k pace (7:05-7:20) w/ 1:30 rest (I walked these)
Summary:

• Totals: 9.05 mi, 1:27:09, 9:37 pace
• 1/2 mile splits: 3:51.9 (7:44), 3:47.7 (7:35), 3:44.1 (7:28), 3:39.7 (7:19)
• 1/4 mile splits: 1:47.7 (7:11), 1:49.2 (7:17), 1:48.4 (7:13), 1:48.6 (7:14), 1:48.9 (7:16), 1:49.2 (7:17), 1:47.3 (7:09), 1:48.2 (7:13)

Hit Rate: 13/15 (86.6%)

The half milers felt real relaxed today. The pace just came real easy and I tried to ease into all the repeats so that I picked up speed as the interval went on. I also tried to channel the kind of focus I have during races into my running today and really worked on feeling smooth and strong instead of thinking too much about effort. There's a huge difference between trying to run hard and trying to run fast and I think focusing on the latter is what made my run today so good. For the first time I'm starting to see how this crazy pace I'm working around could be do-able for an entire 5k. It doesn't feel like I'm fighting the will of the universe every time I try to get up to that pace, it feels like a good aerobic pace instead of a push push push push push kind of pace, the breathing is much more under control now than it had been when I first started doing these interval runs. It's all coming together and I love that I'm finding a comfortable, smooth, AND quick stride. It's something I'm familiar with in the pool, that the key to swimming fast is feeling fast in the water. Turns out the same thing applies with running on land. In any case, been really excited about the progress I've been making with the running. Have no idea if this will translate in race conditions yet, but just knowing that I can hit workouts like this and throw around speed I definitely thought I didn't have makes me happy. Time for more studying!

Much love,

Jess

What is training fasted...

[Day 140]

It's been the first time in a while that I've literally gotten up, thrown clothes on, and went for a workout. When it was routine, it never felt as good as a fed afternoon workout, but it didn't feel terrible either. Now that it's not so routine, my body was rebelling against me as hard as it could this morning. I swear I was half asleep the entire run. Everything felt hard, my legs didn't feel like turning over, it was short and slow yet somehow still real rough. Glad I got out and did it though, another full day of just sitting around studying would've probably killed me. (My schedule didn't allow for an afternoon run break so I opted to just get something short in in the morning before things picked up for the day. Case in point: I'm writing this from lab at 9:30 pm. Yeah it's been one of those days.)

Today's Workout: AM easy run
Summary: 4.58 mi, 43:29, 9:30 pace, 174 spm average
Pace splits by mile: 9:26, 9:42, 9:35, 9:34, 8:56
Hit Rate: 12/14 (85.7%)

Officially speaking I think I'm gonna try and get that interval run in tomorrow afternoon. I also have a lot of studying to do though and some errands to run and I have to cook for lunch which may turn out to be a major time suck...we'll see how productive I am and play it by ear. If I don't have time or the mental energy for something hard and heavy, I'll just take another easy to moderate 4-6 miles and live with that because I'm in med school and exams are a thing and what are you gonna do right?

Gonna head home and do core work and stretch and hit the sack now. Happy Thursday! (:

Much love,
Jess

And there goes the dropped ball, but it's okay

[Day 139]

I go to med school. Sometimes I think I can suck it up and be exhausted and get on fine doing what I do but that's just not true. Opted to nap in the pm today because I was entirely non-functional. Chose to focus the rest of my time on school work rather than on squeezing in a workout. It was the right call. It's nice to not be training super seriously for something and have the ability to just axe workouts when I have to prioritize other stuff. I spent a lot of the past few months feeling torn between all of these different things that I wanted to accomplish. It's nice to have a single clear priority that I can put above other things and not constantly feel so conflicted about. Gonna try and run in the AM tomorrow if I can. No promises lol.

I'm tempted to drop the hit rate count because I know it's not gonna look good, but I'm also really curious about what the hit rate will turn out to be if I continue tracking it and choose to just live my life instead of constantly trying to work my life around training. I think it'll be an informative number honestly so I'm going to keep tracking it, even though I think there's a chance it might make me feel a little bad. The knowledge is worth that risk. Besides, I finished that last training block on a stellar 91.6% while still managing to do med school, so I'm allowed to drop the ball however much I want now. xD

Hit Rate: 11/13 (84.6%)

Send me good vibes for a good studying day tomorrow, I'm really needing it for the upcoming exam week. (:

Much love,
Jess

PS - Still going strong on that daily core/stretching! So proud! (:

Rainy days

[Day 138]

Today's Workout: PM easy run
Summary: 4.90 mi, 46:40, 9:31 pace, 173 spm average
Pace splits by mile: 9:31, 9:38, 9:23, 9:37, 9:25
Hit Rate: 11/12 (91.6%)

Ran with Brian in the rain today. Took the bike path so we were a little short of 5 miles but whatever. Interval run on the schedule for tomorrow.

Much love,
Jess

It's a good thing the schedule is flexible

[Day 137]

Some days you got work to do and your long run has to be a not so long run. Whatever school's the priority.

Today's Workout: AM base run, 6 mi
Summary: 6.17 mi, 54:42, 8:52 pace average, 179 spm average
Pace splits by mile: 9:17, 9:14, 9:01, 8:46, 8:29, 8:27
Hit Rate: 10/11 (90.9%)

Easy run in the AM tomorrow. Happy Monday e'erbody! (:

Much love,
Jess

Rest!

[Day 136]

I'm really just procrastinating work by writing this. I always forget to do posts on rest days so I guess it's good I'm doing it. Am a tad sore from yesterday, not the worst thing in the world but it's been forever since I've been in the gym and experienced gym soreness that my brain is just like, noooooo nooooooo nonononononono. Yeah. Long run tomorrow morning, considering doing it fasted just b/c I'm limited on time. Don't know if that's a good idea, but it'll be a slow/chill pace so it couldn't hurt right? I'll take some Shot Bloks before I head out (and maybe eat right before bed tonight to try and keep energy stores up when I wake up) and hopefully things will be chill. We shall see.

I somehow slept like close to 10 hours last night and still woke up tired. What a crazy life. I also haven't made/found time to go grocery shopping and am not sure when this week I'll get to do that. Slightly concerning. We'll see what comes of that too.

Happy Sunday! (:

Much love,
Jess

Dranks and the gym

[Day 135]

Was planning on taking a ride this morning. Didn't, by virtue of spending last night getting wasted out of my mind and pretty much all of today dying because I was so hungover. Did go to the gym with Hayley, had a really chill session b/c I was still hungover...Opted to keep all the weights really conservatively low since it's been like a month since I was last in the gym.

Today's Workout: PM gym sesh w/ Hayley
Summary:

• Back squats: 3 x 12 @ 95#
• Flat bench: WU 12 @ 45, 3 x 12 @ 75#
• Pulldowns: 3 x 12/12/8-4 @ 7 plates
• Straight arm cable pulldowns: 3 x 12 @ 5 plates
• DB rows: 3 x 12 @ 40#

Hit Rate: 9/10 (90%)

Taking tomorrow off and getting back at it next week. Happy Saturday! (:

Much love,

Jess

Suck it, expectations!

[Day 134]

Lol I think I'm better at tempo runs than I am at intervals. Or maybe I'm just better at working out when my stomach isn't pissed off at me? Who knows. I had a great run today. Was expecting it to be tremendously horrible because the set was tough, but it was actually super great. Numbers first, then thoughts.

Today's Workout: Tempo run, 1.5 mi WU, 4 mi @ HM pace (8:10-8:25), 4 mins recovery (under 11:00), 1 mi @ 10k pace (7:35-7:50), WD (should've taken a longer WD but really didn't want to so...yeah...)
Summary: 7.53 mi, 1:06:01, 8.46 pace, 180 spm average (!!!!!!!!)
Interval Splits:

• WU: 1.5 mi, 14:33, 9:42 pace
• 4 mi @ HM:
• 1-2: 16:40 (8:20 pace), 105 ft gain, 10 ft loss
• 3-4: 16:30 (8:10 pace), 66 ft gain, 125 ft loss
• Recovery interval: 4:00, 0.41 mi, 9:43 pace
• 1 mi @ 10k: 7:42 pace
• WD: 0.62 mi (loooooool), 6:46 (loooool), 10:54 pace

Hit Rate: 8/8 (100%)

Notes/thoughts:

• Little bit of anterior knee pain in the R leg, probably related to the fact that my IT band on that side is really tight, but it's okay b/c I'm taking 2 days off from running (probably gonna ride my bike tomorrow and I'm also hitting up the gym with a friend who wants to get into lifting) over the weekend and will be sure to do lots of stretching and maintenance stuff to get that fixed up.
• Mile 2 of the 4 mi tempo was rough. It was mostly this long protracted low grade uphill and I was thinking that if I had to maintain that effort for another two miles I might die. Turns out it made the rest of those miles feel like cake because yay subsequent net elevation loss! Lol
• My brain is definitely adjusting its definition of "pick it up" pace. Like HM pace used to feel insanely fast to me and now it feels sort of just like generic quick running. Gotta focus to stay there, but not as destructive as it used to feel. 
• The 1 mi interval started off really great. The first like 1/4 mile-ish of that was fast and fantastic and then things started to gradually fall off. It's kind of like swimming I guess, the third leg is always the hardest, b/c the third 1/4 mile of that was bad. And then it was like, DON'T FALL OUT OF THE PACE RANGE RUN JESS RUN for the last bit so it all turned out fine in the end, but uh trying to figure out what a consistent 10k effort is is something I'm gonna have to work on.
• I didn't walk the recoveries! I walked a little bit after the 10k effort, but even then it was a tiny bit before I was back jogging again. I just didn't feel as generally wrecked by this run as I had been feeling after the last few fast runs, which is good. My stomach cooperating had a big role to play in that I think.
• The crazy thing is, I'm here like, omg I did so awesome yay! And then I look at next week's workouts and obviously they get harder because that's what workout progressions do and I'm back to freaking out. xD But not in a bad way. I actually felt really confident going into today's workout because I felt really good on yesterday's easy run and so I had faith in the ability of my legs to do what had to be done, which was nice. I'm going to try and carry this momentum forward into next week so I don't spend all my time cowering in fear of upcoming workouts. It'll be tough but I think I have it. And I'm getting back in touch with my inner age group swimmer who is all like "tough things are the funnest things to do ever!" and half of me is like "yeah!" and the other half of me is like "who is this crazy chick and why are we still friends with her?!" Lol crushing workouts is/are immensely satisfying though, I'm pretty lucky I get to do this in my free time. 

Work work work work work for the rest of the day now, followed by the screening of our med school class show!!!!!! Just listen to this awesomeness: click here. So pumped! Happy Friday everyone!

Much love,

Jess

Falling short

[Day 133]

I had a rough night last night, had a late start this morning, had to cut my run short so I could still make it to small group/lab. Disappointed that I wasn't on top of my sleep schedule, disappointed that I didn't suck it up and get up early enough to get my entire run in anyways, just generally disappointed with myself.

Today's Workout: AM easy run, 4 mi (planned 5 mi)
Summary: 4.05 mi, 39:31, 9:45 pace, 178 spm
Pace splits by mile: 10:23, 9:55, 9:23, 9:25
Hit rate: 7/7 (100%) - I honestly don't even feel good about giving myself credit for this run but I know that dropping a mile on an easy day isn't actually as atrocious of an offense as it feels like to me...

Notes/thoughts:

• That mile that I dropped this morning is probably going to haunt me for a while, especially if I fall short of my goals/expectations this summer. I'm not good at letting things like this go. It's probably a terrible trait of mine, but I can't help it. Cutting things short or not giving all the effort I want to give just doesn't sit well with me. I can't help it. 
• I started out real slow but was surprised that after about15-20 minutes my legs seemed to get into it and I actually felt real strong and smooth on the way home. It reminds me of in-season swimming. I need insanely long warm ups to get my body into it but it will perform if I give it time to warm up. Apparently this may be a thing that holds true for the running as well.
• Freaking out about tomorrow. The run is gonna be long and tough and ends on some real fast running and I just don't know what to expect of myself and the level of effort it'll take to hit all the paces right. And the thing is, I really don't think I can mentally take another disappointing day. I need a good day, I really need a good day, but I have to make those good days with my own two hands (or I guess legs in this case) and the pressure feels really crazy sometimes. I don't know if I can do it, but I know I have to try and I know that if I try and I fall short, Friday night will be a long one and I don't want that. Pressure pressure pressure.

Have a good Thursday folks (:

Much love,

Jess

Can't stop won't stop

[Day 132]

There's a lot I feel like I have on my mind but not so much that I want to write down. Let's talk numbers, then feelings.

Today's Workout: PM run, intervals

• 15-20 mins easy WU
• 4 x 1/2 mi @ 10k pace (7:35-7:50) w/ 3 mins rest (jogged the first three, walked the last)
• 4 x 1/4 mi @ 5k pace (7:05-7:20) w/ 1:30 rest (walked these)
• 15-20 mins easy WD

Summary: 7.56 mi, 1:16:28, 10:07 average pace
Interval splits:

• 1/2 milers: 3:53.1 (7:46), 3:51.4 (7:43), 3:40.7 (7:41). 3:51.7 (7:44)
• 1/4 milers: 1:47.6 (7:10), 1:48.3 (7:13), 1:49.0 (7:16), 1:49.7 (7:19)

Hit rate: 6/6 (100%)

Notes/thoughts:

• My stomach was really bothering me today. About 10 minutes into my warmup, I had some pain and nausea started up and I just thought to myself, Jess you've gone to swim practice on so much worse and cranked it out, there's no reason you can't do this. So I did it. With some amount of compromise. I let myself walk half the rest intervals because I felt like I had to to keep the contents of my stomach in my tummy. I felt pretty horrible, would have much rather gotten to just concentrate on the running instead of concentrating on fighting the feeling in my stomach, but you know what, it's been a while I think since I've been really mentally challenged and I always welcome that. I think you need to be mentally challenged regularly to remind yourself that you can dig deep and overcome that so I'm glad I was forced to be tougher today than I am on any other regular day. 
• I was really surprised by how easy the 5k paced 400s came. 1/4 mile is an incredibly short distance apparently. Honestly the first four 1/2 milers didn't feel great compared to last week, but I got through them fine, and I was just worried about not having any kind of speed in my legs but I shot through that first 1/4 miler and I knew I was gonna be fine. I would like to not be walking recoveries in the future but it let me do the important work on pace and kept me from having to throw in the towel early so I'll take it for today. 
• There's something qualitatively different about running at 10k pace versus 5k. It's really interesting to be finding run speed gears because I'm starting to learn the difference with my body in terms of how to maximize efficiency at each pace. The swimmer part of my brain turns on and that's just what it does. It's really amazing to have been doing sports my whole life and still get to learn new things about my own movement and feel those patterns form and shape and adjust as I get better. That's one of my favourite things about exercise and it's really awesome that intervals really bring that out for me when it comes to running.
• I've genuinely just missed working hard and getting my ass kicked by workouts. I feel like I had a lot of intensity the past few months on the bike trainer because that's something I've been really focusing on and trying to improve on, but I haven't been very intense in the pool and I have never been very intense about running. It's just really satisfying to lay everything you have out on the line during a set and then spend the 15-20 minutes of warm down willing myself to not drop dead on the side of the road or in the park somewhere because I'm almost too tired to even want to go home. That's fun, I get a kick out of that. 
• I want to be really proud of what went on today. I don't feel it as powerfully as I know I should. These paces are cake to so many people but this is insanely fast for me and is a level of running that I didn't think I was capable of doing. So I want to be insanely proud and insanely happy with myself. Instead I feel sort of meh because I walked some of the recoveries and I feel like I should've jogged them but I didn't. I don't want that to drag me down but it does. I'm a little too ambitious for my own good sometimes. I'm bad at just being happy when I do a good job. It wasn't a perfect job, but it was a good job and I should be proud. I am trying to just repeat that to myself over and over again and perhaps it will eventually cement in my head as reality. Who knows.

Easy run on the schedule for tomorrow, 5 miles on the schedule, I'll play the turn around point by feel because I feel pretty wrecked from today and I do want to actually recover tomorrow so I can hit another insane tempo run on Friday. In other news, have a running agreement with Henry that I'm going to try and do 10 minutes of core work and 10 minutes of stretching every night, so I'm gonna finish the work I have to do tonight and then go do that. Working hard, staying hungry. Happy Hump Day! (:

Much love,

Jess

EM II exam today help

[Day 131]

Today's Workout: AM easy run
Summary: 4.56 mi, 43:18, 9:29 pace average, 177 spm average
Pace splits by mile: 9:40, 9:43, 9:32, 9:23, 8:54
Hit Rate: 5/5 (100%)

Definitely feeling a little bit of residual fatigue from yesterday but nothing horrible. Freaked out about having to run fast tomorrow as always but I'm sure it'll be fine. It was drizzling a bit today and there was some lightning, which kind of freaked me out because EM II has made me really scared about getting struck by lightning. Evidently I didn't actually get struck by lightning, so it's all good lol. So much studying to do today. Interval workout tomorrow! Happy Tuesday folks!

Much love,
Jess

Long run (:

[Day 130]

Today's Workout: PM long run, 10 mi
Summary: 10.46 mi, 1:41:46, 9:44 pace average, 176 spm
Pace splits by mile: 9:47, 9:53, 9:42, 9:49, 9:48, 9:23, 9:50, 9:42, 9:50 9:41, 9:24
Hit Rate: 4/4 (100%)

Still marveling at the fact that I can take this distance at an easy pace and have it actually feel comfortable nowadays. There was a time where every 8+ mile run hurt simply by virtue of it being long, no matter what the pace. It's kinda cool to find progress in how far I can run comfortably. Legs are feeling it now, but in general I'm doing pretty well today. I was really hungry the last 3-4 miles though which was rough. Was really just thinking about running home so I could eat. Food = life.

Easy run on the books for tomorrow morning. Will probably take 4 miles but we'll see how I feel. Happy Monday everyone!

Much love,
Jess

PS - I just stretched! Yay good job Jess (: